flimflam Freddy, Frankenville’s only funeral director
actively sought out numbskulls, dimwits and nitwits
an expert in cajoling them into signing contracts
assuring them that their funerals would be exquisite
he verbally mentioned doves, orchestra, and magic shows
none of this was in the contract they signed
a contract that guaranteed nothing
a contract that assured him of unbelievable amounts of money
funerals that cost others six thousand,
cost these nimb-nuts twenty thousand
in teeny tiny print it mentioned that additional expenses might be incurred
and they were
they are goof balls
numb nuts, crazies
they run their police cars into each other
they blame everyone else
each one is uniquely incompetent
a bunch of weird nincompoops
numbskulls who make this movie hilarious
I cannot watch it enough times
it always makes me laugh
sometimes I am stressed out that
I am so easy
Their clueless inane fangs of reed
Strive to bite what's made of steel;
Deriding the stronger sinew of virtue
They cling onto feeble foibles untrue.
To headache more reasonable head
Is the very principal aim they're bred...
These pithy bothersome numbskulls
Coined with dimmest grasp that lulls.
It came in with ice cream and half empty sunscreen
And went out with goosebumps and “EEK!” Halloween
That autumnal breeze and the fire in the trees
Gave way to demons and trembly knees
Leaves all relinquished their sure Summer grip
Fluttering down they would duck, dive and dip
To settle in russet hues there on the ground
But eddy and flit as the breeze whipped around
And by Halloween with the ground full of leaves
There’s zombies and ghouls in whom no-one believes
Well maybe the numbskulls who worship the night
But then monster lovers were never that bright
That late autumn day there was warmth in the air
I sat ’gainst a tree and I slumbered right there
Twas All Hallows’ Eve but why would I care
No fancy dress demon would give me a scare
I’ll suffer no grief from some worn out tradition
I’ll scoff at the undead and show no contrition
No werewolf nor vampire would make my skin prickle
Well... not til the leaf monster gave me a tickle!
Hordes of numbskulls
ride the ether waving on its waves.
Hi kites twirling upon a digital wind.
Each empty head has but one thought,
a desire to be seen.
Hordes watch, flock to the hand-held stage
leer, laugh, get bored with the show
switch to game mode to fight dragons
with dirty fingernails.
What a grand way to die this is!
Shuffle dancing or
ass's twirking, cute or crass
while the kettle of life boils away
and the body pours
until out of gas.
They must,
they simply must be
in every bodies eye,
Must be noticed
and so they preform, risk all
for a dare.
The audience does not care
they are pictures in a camera,
dancing, fighting, or humping,
busy being
the exhibition of the day
minds far away
chattering to themselves.
Money they want for their play or the
paltry currency
of a less than minor celebrity,
a hope that like any bubble
or party balloon
will pop all too soon.
Then what is left? Only this,
the shriveled skin, the idiotic grin
skid marks on a wasteland of time
where they decline.
Amelia, what were you thinking?
It was still the dark ages for women
Your parents and your husband spoiled you.
You had no idea what was waiting
Large greedy hands could not wait to get you
To make you what you were not
Simpering and begging, whining and groveling.
They thought you too proud.
You were captured by the Numbskulls
Who capture all sassy confident, assertive women
And torture them into admitting
That men are superior in every way
You did not go lightly or easily
They rapidly realized they had
A wild cat on their hands.
One who had been spoiled.
You were making too much of a ruckus.
They got rid of you quietly, and in the dark.
You became a pirate, a water girl.
Numbskulls being numbskulls!
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