Long Infomercials Poems

CHALLENGE TITLE POETRY CONTEST FOR AUGUST ON POEMHUNTER.COM! 

'WHY DO TURTLES CROSS THE ROAD? '


OK FOLKS! Please choose your favorite poem from those entered here and remember too to give your reasons for your choice....

Read More

Consonant Like A Vow (el)

Now ma nada twirly (to early) twittering 
condolences to the esprit de corps, qua 
(just recently) late John McCain, and his 
surviving family suddenly damning original 
way word odd did see,...

Read More

In the year 3030
Time travel is what some like to say
a common convenient conveyance.
And is sold like Air travel or Train fair.
Seeing that most people have cars that fly.
For some time travel is considered 
to...

Read More

GROGGY BEDHEAD NO COFFEE SHUT THE BLINDS .... PRESIDENTIAL NO GOOD CHOICES TELIVISION SIGNAL GLITCH SMEAR ART CAMPAIGN... LATE NIGHT REHEATED RERUN RETWEEKED RETWEETED MORNING NEWS?....
MORE RAIN TOO HOT BROKEN LEFT WINDSHIELD WIPER.... SAME OLD...

Read More

Volatile Hazardous Noxious Material...

Spews out the maw
bare n paws size of a bear
yes, him Donald Trump
with maniacal glare
gussied up as inane
name calling offensive

analogous to an overstuffed
ego freezing cold stare
putrid enfilade flatulence issuing
from his doughy derriere
smug...

Read More

I'm trying a brand new recipe



that is claimed to be delishful.



Fresh beans with hue of grue



with butter pat and bacon fat melded.



I served it to my family



 and waited for the praises



My tween son smarked,



"This...

Read More

Cossack Cowboys
Riding Llamas
That they dress
In pink pajamas
Teeny boppers
Blowing bubbles
Biker chicks
Causing trouble
Nuns in Habits
Punks in chains
One or two
Of the deranged
Rubbing Buddha belly
Cravers
And the band
Harvey Danger
David Bowie
Elton John
Both of them
With Spacesuits on
Vegetarians 
Eating chicken
Love it fried
Finger licking
In...

Read More

In the beginning, the Word stood alone,
A solitary witness to creation.
Its single nascent syllable was pleasant in tone,
But found itself in need of conversation.

In the beginning, the Word harnessed time,
Till language lit the darkness of...

Read More

What's with all those infomercials 
Those people talking in circles 
Trying to sell you stuff you don't need 
Tell you their product will do this guaranteed 

They are always on really late 
With their shtick...

Read More

Yup, did it again...2 am, and I lost 4 or 5 poems...which will have to be redone...I 
will try to wait till tomorrow, as I am exhausted from a stressful day...what am I 
doing wrong???...

Read More

I had another lover over last night.
Loneliness.
Knocking on my door, even though he has his own key.
Beneath my silent covers he crawls.
Mummers moist against 
my blue bruised sighs.  I confess salty, soft, sins.
Embrace.
Under stale...

Read More

Cresent moon consorts 
Met on a hillside, dew-soaked and overgrown
Seducing the sun from sleep.

Before infomercials succumbed to scheduled shows
You were my cartoons and cereal.
Sugary, sitting so close to your screen.

Our skin blowing steam,
Fattening the fog...

Read More

Sleep number sixty-five,
get a set of Ginsu knives.
One hundred fifty all time hits,
a rowing machine to make you fit.

An amazing chamois to dry your car,
a GPS to tell you how far.
A contour belt to tighten...

Read More

I have this recurring fantasy. I travel to northern Ontario and hire a bush pilot who flies me to the Great Slave Lake. It is a one way trip. 

I carry my trusty Ronco Survival...

Read More

TV- you see allot of dumb stuff, 
 you hear their commercials… 
clever, yet they holler, isn't this enough, 
they bombard you with paid infomercials, 

We’ve turned it off, switched to DVD's 
an our computer, xbox...

Read More

Mind is racing, too tired to sleep
Tried everything, even counting sheep

Turn on the TV as the channels I scan
Being up all night was not the plan

Infomercials and movies, all seen before
Battling my brain, this means...

Read More

Things between us have changed. 
Pretending only presents the underlying problem. 
We spend our time in seperate rooms.
The television on two seperate channels.
Still unable to find what we're looking for.
Demanding peace unwilling to press for...

Read More

I didn't choose to be vivacious 
I would take it back any day
These hips I grew into
were far more than my youth could chew
I remember daddies eyes 
Before my hips put him 
In compromising positions...

Read More

Dark and murky they hide their face
political appetite for many
I don't have any
even if there was a parking space

A star some born in which to be
some hunger for destruction
fear of abduction
from the paparazzi

I was almost...

Read More

The souls of the Damned in Perdition
Oft complain of their hellish conditions.
   “TV reception is bad,
   There’s no WiFi to be had,
And there's talk of starting a petition!”

And added a lost...

Read More