Long Humorous poetry Poems
Long Humorous poetry Poems. Below are the most popular long Humorous poetry by PoetrySoup Members. You can search for long Humorous poetry poems by poem length and keyword.
I did not post a poem yesterday…
I’m sure some of you were concerned…even though nobody inquired….
to set your minds at ease…I didn’t forget…I am not sick…nor have I retired…
It wasn’t from lack of inspiration or a dearth of creativity…
It all comes down to sleeping in…a biscuit…raspberry jam…and the legend of a tree.
On our way to North Carolina we always stop in Athens, Georgia
for the opportunity to enjoy
A breakfast of our favorite biscuits topped with raspberry jam…
at a restaurant called Momma’s Boy.
We have to get there early…or in long lines we have to wait….
and after driving 10 hours the day before…we slept in…and were running late.
And what would make us even later…was our desire to stop and meet
‘The tree that owns’ itself which stands at the end of the last Athen’s cobblestone street.
We stopped at the tree and still made it to Momma’s Boy on time…
just like we diagramed…
we had the first 2 biscuits they made that morning
topped with their delicious raspberry jam…
It wasn’t till we were on the road headed for our North Carolina home
That I thought about then remembered…I hadn’t posted a poem.
How I had somehow upset the balance of nature…disturbed its symmetry…
by allowing a tree, a biscuit and some raspberry jam to take precedence over poetry…
I’ll try to get back to writing a poem a day…that is my goal…what I’ve always planned….
unless there’s a Momma’s Boy in North Carolina…in which case…
I hope you’ll understand.
The List
I was waiting by my mailbox
To hear news from the Soup
I know they like to keep me
Somewhere, in the loop
I couldn’t wait to see, ME !
Somewhere at the top
Of The Hundred best read poems
That reader's thought were Hot
While I nestled in my chair
Took my subtle writers pose
With my thumb under my chin
And my finger, side my nose
I started to peruse
The list presented clear
While looking for My Name
I found it wasn’t there
Perhaps an over site
Could sure explain, a lot
They failed to read, the comments
And all the praise, I got
But then, it came to me
Those guys are really smart
My poems are so good
Their’re simply off the charts
By JTCurtis
And so I wrote a poem…
Perhaps it will get a few reads
and …
if I’m lucky
one or two comments
but they are so rare
as Poetry Soup
is like a graveyard
But I won’t be deterred -
after all
this masterpiece
of poetic genius
is bound to get
first place
in John Lawless’s
current contest...
I may get Poem of the Day
or even Poem of the Week
which
is usually kiss of death
in contests...
but hey
you can't blame me for trying!
And so I wrote a poem Poetry Contest
Sponsored and to be judged by the very talented John Lawless
n/a in contest judged on 10/20/2020
10/12/20
Tell me
how did we get here
at a swishing swapping party?
(The voices echo in emptiness)
Bubbly cheerful and happy, naked and raw
forever bachelors Larry and Harry,
and the hot mom and the pool boy
go flash dancing with dawn!
Be warned, winkydinks
I had a Martini: ok, maybe four
I don't accept or understand
the drunken Socrates and his ouzo -
he’s the beast with eyes too kind!
What was it like back then ...
on being offered cheese as a dessert -
my blue cheese is a dark, reddish brown ...
Did you know
Hell hath no donuts !
20 Titles From 20 Friends Poetry Contest
Sponsored by Richard Lamoureux
7/18/19
Titles Used -
Tell Me - Poem by Ilene Bauer
How Did We Get Here D M Babbit
at ‘A Swishing Swapping Party’ by Paul Callus
The Voices Echo in Emptiness by Eve Roper
Bubbly Cheerful And Happy by Anne-lise Andresen
Naked And Raw by Maurice Yvonne
Forever Bachelors Larry and Harry by Carolyn Devonshire
The Hot Mom and The Pool Boy by Tim Smith
Flash dancing with dawn! by Connie Marcum Wong
Be warned, winkydinks by Gershon Wolf
I Had a Martini: Ok, Maybe Four by Lin Lane
I Don't Accept or Understand by Dear Heart
The Drunken… by Pashang Salehi
Socrates and his Ouzo by Arthur Vaso
The Beast with Eyes Too Kind by Andrea Dietrich
What was it like back then by Curtis Moorman
On being offered cheese as a dessert by Nina Parmenter
My Blue Cheese is a Dark, Reddish Brown by Mike Gentile
Did you Know by Alexis Y
Hell Hath No Donuts by Michelle Faulkner
Deer poet tree righters fore the cite
Pleas will ewe bee sweet
and worn me if ewe have scene any miss stakes eye have maid
butt eye no my speeling and ewes off English is prefect!
Eye am knot shore if eye have ever tolled ewe
that when eye right poet tree at knight ore in the mourning
eye don’t knead too ewes a smell chequer ore a theo sorearse
Off coarse, eye don’t no weather aisle get a first plaice inn the con test
butt eye want John too chews me sew eye can crews two victory!
HAVE I EVER TOLD YOU THAT...... Poetry Contest
Sponsored by John Lawless
11/11/20
Every now and then,the words once easy flowing
hold back from revealing what I'm knowing
and lost I am to where this poem was going..
Building in significance
the words are lost to all innocence
release is a failure of intended diligence
and I'm trapped in my losing indifference.
Perhaps a laxative would work as a stimulus,
release and expel me from this chrysalis,
provide some imagery of dreamings less frivolous
excuse me while I get a little mischievous.
In this intense consternation
every word lies in constipation
seeking is rigidly intensified
and proceeds with force and agitation
as the thoughts remain anesthetized.
EPIGRAMS
HALF ALLIANCE ...!
A president and an affected actress ...
it's a bear-goat wedding ...!
THE JUDGMENT OF OTHERS!
What others judge of me,
it doesn’t warm me up or cool me down ...
WRITER ...!
Writers do such as God!
They do with their heroes what they wish...
That's why they write so much ...
LOVING ...!
We love the whole of America ...
As long as they don't surpass theirs,
borders...!
TRANSLATED EPIGRAMS / IN CREATIVE INTERACTION
WITH "SATIRIQUES EPIGRAMMES"
BARBARA BOTTON - FRANCE. AND ALKAS POETRY
Well, I suppose that I am again revealing my age,
But I grew up when Burma Shave signs were all the rage!
Could it be that those 'masterly creations' sparked my poetic bent,
As I soaked up a tad of 'culture' as down the rural roads I went?
"Buddy, if its a bit of romance you crave;
Best you slather yer mug with Burma Shave!"
"Why would she deign to give you a cuddly hug?
Better use Burma Shave to smooth yer bristly mug!"
"Fer a smoother shave here's the latest buzz;
Use Burma Shave to rid yer mug of all that fuzz!"
"If you really want to set that romance on fire;
Use Burma Shave to smooth yer mug of all that brier!"
"If you need to clear yer mug of that five-o'clock shade;
Use a heap of Burma Shave with yer razor blade!"
"If scratchy whiskers are causing romance to be rather grim;
Perhaps a dab of Burma Shave would smooth yer trim!"
"If yer love-life with her has nearly disappeared;
Maybe its time to lather-up with Burma Shave on yer beard!"
"If yer whiskers are as scratchy as a field of thistles;
Use Burma Shave on your kisser to rid it of all those bristles!"
(To learn more about Burma Shave signs during the 1920s/30s go to your
search and enter "History of Burma Shave Signs")
I never enter every contest on soup
Sometimes sponsors can be very hard to please
Achieving first place is not always a breeze
Some don’t like me writing poems about poop
Yet every person is unique in our group
Some wonderful poets with great expertise
Writing different forms with consummate ease
To be skilled like them then I’d be cock a hoop
Yet people moan when they don’t get a high place
Think their poetry is much better than 'mine'
Tell the sponsors their judgment is a disgrace
It saddens me their feelings are so malign
Criticise until they are blue in the face
For each of us thinks our poems are divine
Written after reading Tommy Boy's recent blog
Jan Allison
N/A in contest judged on 20th November
Submitted to trashed #4
sponsored by Broken Wings
10~17~15
Italian Sonnet - Rhyme Scheme - abbaabba cdcdcd
My thoughts today, if “U” were “I”
imagine how to justify
An accidental “switcheroo”
would change it all around for you
You thunk you typed the word to think
That brunk you right back from the brink
That truck that you drove home last night
would be a trick! that sheds some light!
If “I” were “U”, I’d check my work
a duty that we ought not shirk
with sicks and sucks and picks and pucks
and don’t forget those ticks and tucks
Good Luck would now be a Good Lick
not bad but you know, it might stick
and serving Duck would be a kick
instead, you would be serving @!@!
And Just in case anyone thinks that the last line is “bawdy”
I was referring to the British pudding with dried fruit!!!