Long Egad Poems

as the PROPHETS of profits, WE lead and WE’re fair
while WE’re living the life of the poor BILLIONAIRE
– silver yachts, pearly castles, cash (plenty to spare) –
with the world on OUR backs... ah! the burdens...

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Introduction: once again I incorporate 
my trademark penchant 
to fabricate fictitiously
portions of the following poetic endeavor
can you care to 
discern fact from fiction?

Attempts at lifelong friendships and holy matrimony...

Shot thru with figuratively cankerous nub,
cuz yours...

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World famous player of the five fingered flute,
   Wasn't quite so happy as he used to be.
   Being alone with just his flute,
   Nice clothes,
   And lounging...

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Hanging pictures today February 5th, 2021 with the missus...
(in an attempt to cover up (overlay) fruit fly waste byproduct)

At four feet eleven (fifty nine inches),
the spouse longitudinally challenged
hence she browbeats her husband,
(who only stands five...

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egad, you possibly exclaim come december first two thousand and seven
   five decades sped by at the blink of an eye
days of adolescence, and infancy  so tender and mild seemed like heaven
...

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Why do today what you can put off till tomorrow?

The following extrapolated 
thought thread exercised,
NOT utilized to intimate 
how Fats Domino belied,
and wowed a crowded house ass-sized.

As a former ace procrastinator, I abhor
putting off doing...

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(the following extrapolated 
     thought thread exercised,
NOT utilized to intimate 
     how Fats Domino belied,
and wowed a crowded house as-sized).

as a former ace procrastinator, i abhor
 ...

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Thine distorted reflection rippled 
within rain maker's pool 
   upon a midnight clear
full moonlight sonata 
   flooded shallow abyss, 
cleaved fractal structures of silence 
reverberating deathly hallow from 'ere
to infinity, whence...

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OKAY? WHAT FIEND STOLE THY BODY ELECTRIC!?

thine distorted reflection rippled 
within rain maker's pool upon a midnight clear
full moonlight flooded shallow abyss, 
cleaved fractal structures of silence 
reverberating deathly hallow from 'ere
to infinity, whence magic...

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My guru carries a set of brass knuckles
you'd think he'd be all yes sir and no sir
but instead I get ahah hoho and egad
I can't do anything right on my best day
and I have the...

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She loves me she loves me not...

Just my luck that when juiced a lad
din grammar school, aye own every
rhyme and reason tubby mad
every friggin time boyhood fingers
plucked petals off flowered daisy...

just as well, a relief...

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2200 E High Street
Pottstown, PA 19464

Upon making a purchase,
yours truly murmurs bonjour
to the man/woman clerk
manning cash register,
(perhaps another day)

maybe soon as tomorrow
January twenty four -
two thousand and twenty,
I will explore
Moonlight madness sale

fifty percent off all...

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The sun rose in the west today – or, perhaps, I was standing on my head?
I went to a funeral for my very best friend, but the chap wasn’t even dead!

Said he wanted to be...

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tension between
this singular male offspring and me dad
proved more ineradicable
then tensile strengthened steel rebar
which wall veritably, unequivocally,
terribly outlived purposefulness, egad
yet remained intact

even after this son left off
way after being a lad
din viz Harris heir,
withstood the...

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That little boy who I used to tickle
And helped learn to tie his shoes,
Just called me up on the telephone
To give me the happy news.

That young boy who I taught to wrestle
And watched him practice...

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Aunt Elf is brewing a Halloween treat,
something wicked, and ghoulishly special to eat.
Flesh of lizards and roaches and frogs, egad!
Aunt Elf has mixed  them all into a salad. 

A cauldron simmering way  back...

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TEN DAYS TILL CHRISTMAS

Ten days till Christmas
Ten days of worry    hustle
What shall I get her?

She won’t help me out
Won’t even give me a clue
What’s a man to do?

She never complains
About my Christmas...

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if God were here right now,
i would offer him a slice of three layer lasagna
i wonder if He would ask for welches grape or purple wine
it would be a First Sunday
it would be the best...

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It’s wrong to judge people by appearance
So when he approached me with that grimace
I tried to see what’s inside
Perhaps a sweet prince did hide
Behind scaly green skin on the surface

He offered his lips, I felt...

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let's start with a line and see where it leads
People like blood so I will make mine bleed

a zombie a chainsaw perhaps some bats
For good measure I'll throw in some black cats

I'm running out of...

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She slithers with niceties, fangs intact
Stealing your gaze with her manipulative act.

Can’t see her reflection, for there is none, egad!
You search for her heart but there’s none to be had

Does she think we don’t see...

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ICKY, SUCKY, YUCKY
???????????????

 wheezing, sneezing; allergy in my throat
darn green mucus pasted in my hair,
steroids tumbling down on  chest
and  “no- bath -for -days”  anywhere!

mites and dust in  rinsed fingernails
fever flushing ...

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OWSZAT

The match was slow and boring
The runs were far between,
And an air of dreamy somnolence
Hung o’er the village green.
Then out from the pavilion
A handsome figure ran.
The crowd sat up, paid notice,
A loud applause began.
The stranger...

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my wallet’s tounge getting longer and longer 
credit cards’promos pumping stronger
flat tv, i-pad, santa trimmings  at low cost
really now, my unpaid dues on zero defrost
egad, i’ll be jailed being a triple goner

the dark side...

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Long, long ago and longer
When I was but a child
I read of Doctor Livingstone
Who ventured in the wild.
Dr. David had no fear
He went where few had gone.
This missionary and explorer 
To Africa was drawn.
The unsophisticated...

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