Long Awakened Poems
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This dreadedness has haunted me since my abrupt traumatic brain injury followed by daytime sleep apnea DAYTIME SLEEP APNEA unable to stay awake all day falling a sleep in doctors office on the bus trains in meetings dreaming awake taking several ten minutes naps with full blown dreams panic attacks as I awaken sleep still dreaming the worse nightmare ever if I forget to take my daytime sleep apnea medication to keep me awake all day than when night falls I could sleep but the dream takes over the fear of getting on the train dozing off for only a few seconds awakened by the conductor saying this is the last stop I look around I’m the only one on the train my bag is ripped a trail of the contents of my purse is scattered day turned to night in what seemed like only a blink of my eyes the conductor firmly asked my name do I have any identification I shake my head no my things are scattered could I call someone for you I can’t remember my name my family where am I receipts familiar ink pen from my purse here write your name I don’t know my name sir do you recognize this place I respond it’s the wrong stop please take me home he squints searching my eyes for a response I feel unconscious he looks straight through me unaware how broken I am I’d fallen asleep forgetting myself my head hurts and I want to go back to sleep maybe I could remember where I got on this train at maybe if I fall back to sleep I will wake up and this nightmare would end wake up honey wake up i open my eyes I’m safe in my bed I’m safe I’m home
Amid falling leaves, my thoughts wander far,
as, gracefully, they cascade through the air.
From long winter sleep, they awoke with spring;
unfolded their fullness at the summer peak.
Yes, what a journey their venture provides-
in very few months, each life is fulfilled.
For them, time is fathomed by seasons of days-
unlike my much longer, well-measured years.
Oh, falling leaves, like my autumn of life-
you slowly drift down on faded green lawns.
Red-orange-gold colors boast your last hurrah,
as they calmly, peacefully, twirl to the ground.
A calm ride from branches to blanket the earth;
yet, you weathered storms on long, windy nights.
You shielded the nests upon fine, sturdy limbs
and honored your seasons as best as you could.
My feelings unfold as each lone leaf descends-
reminiscing my own, long, well-seasoned years;
from green, tender bud to full burnished art-
my thoughts wander far, amid falling leaves-
yet, hang on the hope of the next new Spring;
with awakened birth, new life will begin.
What story should I tell?
This is the tale of how the lonely acorn fell
far from where the mighty oak had stood
cut by the hands of man, felled for its wood.
The mother-father tree lay across the laid bare land
cut down in the forest no more to stand
and the branches stretched out along the dirt
releasing the acorn from its berth.
This acorn scratched and bruised, browned and torn
slipped into the streamflow of new rivers formed
and floated out to the open sea
she rode the tides salted and found herself - free.
The gulf stream path sped north into the wintry chill
as she cut across the sands where tidal waves were spilled
and a gull eyed her glistening shiny coat
and scooped her up but not down into her throat.
Pass the inlets, along the earthen roads
the gull dropped her beyond the manmade folds
where fertile land had long ago appeared
and squirrel and chipmunk vied for burrows cleared.
Buried deep in fertile soils blessed
this acorn was welcomed as the forest began its undress
with autumn fall and winter tamed,
she was awakened by the sun and rain.
This acorn found a place in the northeast spring
with hairy roots that began to form and sing,
of an acorn that was newly born.
escaping the outer shell coat torn.
She began to grow far from where she fell
and as life took on its hold in sapling meld
the newest oak began to watch history unfold
and knew then she was not the last acorn in the mold.
As time and historic years hurried pass
she knew she was not nor would be the last
with nature's watch and thirst
she was, the very first.
4/24/20
for John Lawless contest
The Last Acorn
SONG OF HOPE
Verse I Eternal power cascades to pour down
Hold that energy as your crown.
. Awakened life transparent nice
Bright luminous through sacrifice.
Verse 2 Take lessons from adversity.
Ruthless trouble shows no pity
your sacred nectar emissions
bringing success on your missions
Chorus Start fearless song on good missions
Destroy doubts and all confusions
Honest thoughts to make decisions
Proceed dauntless with orison.
Verse 3 Earnest devotion on day and night
Make quest for goal in delight.
Overcome all dullness and darkness.
Chase away fatigue and obsess.
Verse 4 At the end, waiting victory
to greet with triumph and glory
Death or demise on transition
to achieve reincarnation
Chorus Start fearless song on good missions
Destroy doubts and all confusions
Honest thoughts to make decisions
Proceed dauntless with orison.
07/30/20
'A Song of Hope' Contest by John Hamilton
.
7/6/22
Finally found the way at long last
Ill happenings in headlines and on broadcast
At first I had problems that I never got past
One of many things I lost at
Failed to stay on that
At times I lost track
As well as contact
Issues arose, they rarely became compact
There was always fine print in the contract
In remote areas there wasn't a nearby off-ramp
A new day another gauze pack
The same can be said for piles of dog crap
Why is it that people always talk trash?
If it's too good to be true, it often has drawbacks
All around a continual undertow
Lord doesn't nor does my mother know
Due to the level of danger there was different color codes
Not like all these other clones
In another zone
Free the guys, bring our brothers home
Most times
Paying it all no mind
Never going to play both sides
By way of how the crow flies
When it's low tide
The chance is there, otherwise opportunity will go by
Why am I always drunk and so high?
Am I just an addict or have I been forsaken?
For a long time I've been awakened
I need it stirred not shaken
As well as a money counter for all the bacon
Still beautiful not misshapen
A world full of labels such as a pagan
No belief in god or satan
The same can be said for hell or haven
Go against me and mine then I react like Liam Neeson in "Taken"
Bring about your end with an iron maiden
Awakened by a battalion,
Alienating thoughts berating me,
Separating my chance to see,
What could truly be,
Hindering my productivity,
A byproduct of society,
Quietly disrupts my day,
I try pushing them away,
Battling my way up,
Putting coffee in my cup,
The upper hand now mine,
As i find my way around,
Drowning out the noise,
I'm poised for progress,
Pressing on ahead,
My head a playground,
As thoughts bounce around,
Bound to my creation,
Some turning into sound,
As vibrations float around,
Grounding my energy,
Entertaining an entity,
The sensitivity grows,
I fall into the shadows,
No one knows how low,
I call out to my foes,
I know my purpose,
It's soon to surface,
We don't deserve this,
The Land was not for purchase,
It's time to repurpose your role,
As the whole regains control.
The loneliest road, a path unknown,
Where footprints fade, the seeds unsown.
Amidst the woods, in silent grace,
A solitary journey we all must face.
Beneath the moon's pale, silver light,
The stars above, a quiet night.
In solitude, we find our way,
A road less traveled, come what may.
Through winding lanes and darkened woods,
The loneliest road, where silence broods.
But in this solitude, we'll find,
A deeper self, an awakened mind.
The loneliest road, it's not in vain,
For in its silence, we attain,
A strength to tread where others fear,
The road less traveled, crystal clear.
So let us walk with hearts held high,
The loneliest road, beneath the sky.
Embrace the journey, bold and true,
For in its solitude, we are.
I awakened and kissed beauty’s face,
Twice on her cheeks, once over her brow,
The sun continued with his slow pace
As her lips parted with a smile that grow
Into a beam bounding me with her grace.
But to where would I escape and hide,
She has eyes that can probe everywhere,
As I walk she seems to walk by my side
While I seek for the center of the sphere
That surrounds us devouring my pride.
Better to pretend and after the sunrise,
Give to beauty her deserved share:
Kisses that will dress her with my praise.
Yet, we know that the best praises are
those give when beauty is also a surprise.
Form:
The Colours of Happy
I am the painter of happy
Traveling along life's dark streets
listening for the beat
Feeling hidden colors with my feet
I see the beauty
beyond the dark
I'm floating within this concrete park
leaving my mark
Playing tag with a can of paint
My art is vibrant
I won't settle for faint
What you see as ugly
it truly aint
I'm not afraid of dingy places
I let colours flow outside the lines
My choices are different kinds
Injecting a symphony between life's spaces
Color removing tear drop traces
Grey shades this paint erases
I see possibilities in others faces
Finger painting
or with a brush
I make the concrete blush
Beauty awakened with my touch
I love the power of yellow
If you are down
or feeling mellow
I just might be the right kinda fellow
My flavors are sweet like jello
Within these hands
I wield a rainbow
My tools, stardust and ultra glow
From my bowl
I pour happy on your soul
Until your own light begins to show
Watch me move quick
when others are slow
Wrapping amazing
with a platinum bow
Let me paint you
a different kinda blue
bright skied Technicolor
the perfect one for you
A bubblegum happy kinda chew
Grab life and dance
do what you want to do
Choices many
don't settle for so few
I can paint you
A penny for your thoughts
help you realize just what you've got
Be the dreamer
it will help a lot
Choose exciting
a life that's red hot
Forget Generic
there is more to be got
Let others choose boring
what I offer
can't be store bought
I'll hand you a brush
we can cover more ground
flower squirting
big footed clowns
Spreading happy around
that joyful sound
Multi colored
me and you
Unconventional freedom bound
our happy can astound!
What was lost
its been refound
Time to open these eyes
happy colors surround
You too can see
just have to look around!
Form:
Tonight I weep.
Awakened by a memory
As my sleep began to part.
Echos of past fallen tears
like footprints on my heart.
So many gifts God gave to me
each one was heaven sent.
I didn’t know what love was,
or even what it meant.
Love for me was a carnival
I played them all like games.
So many hearts were broken
I can’t recall their names.
The best of all life’s lessons
are learned by going through.
I didn’t know what love was.
Til my heart was broken too.
Tonight I weep, but not for me.
It’s a different drummer drumming.
Tonight I weep, but not for me
I know I had it coming.
These tears are those that still remain
from promises unspoken.
Tonight I cry its not for me.
But for the hearts I’ve broken.
Edwin C Hofert.