At Last
09/08/2018
Old thoughts in my mind
Found it hard to be kind
Undeserving, unnerving
Unwilling to unwind
So positivity blind,
To myself unkind
Defeatist, hedonist
True pleasure find
Searching for moderation
Full of resignation
Obsessive, compulsive
Unsure of destination
Questioning my commitment
Thought I’d be committed
Irrational, delusional
Suicide attempt committed
Sanity a soul search
Don’t snuff out my torch
Hopeful, loathful
Alone in the lurch
Reaching down deep
Ruminating can’t sleep
Deception, reflection
Decide to take the leap
Hard to ask for help
Though willing in self
Castigated, Motivated
Bereft of my health
Detox, rehab the help I need
Drugs, my mind and body plead
Addiction, affliction
A hunger, greed a need I feed
Clean of mind and thought
New thinking I’m taught
Sobriquet, Sobriety
Balance in life sought
Do it for self
For no one else
Dedicate, unmedicate
True wealth in health
Physical, mental, health balance
Self love forgiveness, all encompass
Spiritual, physical
True to self at last
What is a perfect human, one who cannot speak, a word of opinion
Cannot hear how strange others sound
Have no eyes to see how loathful the world truly is, how slothful it has became
Lost the ability to smell the roses in the morning
Taste nothing but the soil they were buried in
Yes a perfect human is pretty simple to find
Though they may not have much to say
And they may not be able to tell you where to find a place to find coffee at an odd hour
They may not be able to hang around much
But they certainly had been places, and seen many eventful things
And unlike the average human being, they have at least lived
And found the meaning, which is nothing less then a short lived memory
A tombstone speaks more then a life has to say
They had a game,
A very dangerous one at that,
They had cornered one,
Who existed amongst them,
But did not have their trademark traits,
They were loathful,lazy,incompetent,
Liars,corrupt and resourceless,
They always looked for shortest way to easy money,
With their very limited capabilities,
And in fact he with sincere hardwork,
And capabilities presented a perfect target,
That he complained but little,
And was more of a perfect gentleman,
Made him the perfect victim,
They rallied behind him,
Only for entry and gains,
To and from places he had access,
And they had none,
After entry they,
Simply kicked him aside,
As they collected the rewards,
Of “entry” besides,
The target was caught by next in mafia queue,
Who after entry kicked him back yet again,
The merciless buggers kept on doing this,
For god knows how many years,
Target grew old and tired,
Now some of them did say,
He is ours and belongs to us.
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