I suffocated , air grasped from my lungs
My heart sang for you
My mind protested and my melody seemed to be fading
But I waited for you
Finally like it had just be proselytized
My mind sang the same tune as my heart
And all was a smooth, sound river flow
A river flow like my tears when I had convinced myself that it was different
That your heart no longer beats the same way for me
Like when it felt like you did an introspection
And realized you picked the wrong gemstone
That I was no longer the apple of your eye
But a forbidden fruit from the Garden of Eden
Still I waited for you
For the mere thought of you
Or the mention of your name
Forced my adrenal gland to secrete adrenaline
And my heartbeat increased threatening to rip my Sino atrial node
Betrayed by my hypothalamus failing to cooperate with my cerebrum
I waited for you, I did
And I know for sure that when you go into hiding again
I’ll wait for you
I still remember events when I was two,
The scent of milk, the color blue—
A pulse beneath my skull that never dies,
Whispers from the Gland of what is true.
Tiny furnace in the darkened brain,
You balance hunger, thirst, and ache,
You dream while wide awake,
You script the joy and orchestrate my pain.
Sunlight touches neural seas,
Old sparks ignite along their veins,
Each synapse hums with coded lines,
Translating warmth to memories quiet.
You are the clock, the flame, the heart—
Where time begins, yet never parts,
This gland that lets the soul recall—
How even at two, I remembered it all.
And the 0.07 volts that runs our brain.
When the seed of fear is planted in minds,
It germinates in brains as a tormentor—
Sometimes sown by a whisper,
a shadow,
a lie repeated twice.
When illusion becomes reality,
And starts by making the heart
skip a beat,
then more of its beats,
then all of its beat.
It creates monsters in our eyes in the dark,
Born from our own imaginations.
And it can make them fly,
swirl,
drawl,
crawl,
and do anything—
Make our hairs stand on end,
Our feet walk on eggshells,
on a slippery slope.
It can crimp us into a shrimp.
When it creeps into our grip,
It brings a nice gift of heebie-jeebies—
That send us on a purposeless,
directionless meander,
Like a chicken with head just severed
and left unrestrained.
Fear teaches our hands to fight,
And reaches our legs to take flight,
But it’s never patient to judge us right,
Even when fear is out of sight.
When the seed of fear is well tendered,
Fear can even make us no longer
fear fear.
When its taproot has eaten deep
into the hypothalamus,
Then the mind is already gnawed by monsters
That, time and again, we created
out of nothing.
My hypothalamus is haunting me.
An empty crib.
A bump that will never grow.
Love authenticity, you will always be a part of me.
A ghost in the hallways.
Your heart beat in my deepest quetiapine dreams.
A scan that will never show your sweetest echo.
Father, why would you make me bleed the love so pure?
I lost my voice from speaking you into existence.
He runs his fingers over my stomach my breath hitching, hoping yours is too.
My hypothalamus is haunting me.
vaudeville stepped off the stage
and leapt into the living room
with hot topic-tuned antenna views
shy ventriloquists turned from radio
to television with a vision to be seen
juggling with eye-catching
candle-, duck-, and ten-, pins
off the bowler skids in aerial suspension
abracadabra handlers saw their guests -
half of them enjoyed their shows
hats and canes spinning, shoes tapping
all the old variety - hosts rolling eyes
acrobats rose above them all -
the fall guys, the masters of the skies
Marx, Burns, Allen, Fields, Benny
broke their audience records
showcase of holidays and war
in time with comedy and lyrics
The good old daze
replaced by supersonic, telephonic-cell
(the farmer in the dell throws down his pitchfork
to watch)
to hock back the latest, greatest craze
of series, not to purge, but to binge
staying carefully away from Burnett, Sonny and Cher,
Donny and Marie, and Ed.
drooping eyes spring glasses,
a glass of red or white…
elsewhere, the hypothalamus of the kids,
impacted by Squiddy, Stampy and CaptainSparklez
5/25/2023
The day has run its course
The sun and moon
Change shifts as stars
Illuminate the sky.
Deep in thought as I
Comfortably rest,
My holographic world
Takes hold as
Hypothalamus gears downshift
To easy rider smooth
Cruise mode and I drift
Off to sleep.
My spirit rises freely as
I look back and see myself
Resting in blissful comfort.
Smiling as past memories
Say hello yet remain
Forever still in time,
I continue on my journey.
Time traveling through
Worlds as windows appear
To catch a glimpse of
Recent happenings.
Guiding hands ever so slightly
Redirect my course
Leading me to doors
With the insights of
What lies ahead.
Just a peek though
To guide me along the way.
A faint yet familiar sound
In the distance
Calls out to my spirit
And guides me back home.
I see as I return
You’ve covered us and
Embraced me.
Rejoined with my vessel
You seal me with a
Forehead kiss, warm arms
And a lullaby that
Assures me all is well.
Thump thump, thump thump
Thump thump, thump thump.
Warmed in your embrace,
I rest peacefully with your love
And a smile on my face.
The perfect ending to a
Beautiful evening.
11/28/18
genetic mutations
two toned faces of
true hermaphrodites
claws at the end of the trap
cannibalistic rituals
guiding the souls to the
living descendants
shedding shells pheromones
copulins controls male
hypothalamus
Terror of Blunder
Deep inside the ocean’s heart
A man in black holding a bat
Brain ruled by resentment
Hypothalamus painted with black
Trepidation took over my body
As he moves towards me slowly
Evil sneer I can still see clearly
Despite his Prada’s large hoody
Palpebral met bulbar rapidly
Then tears sprints continually
My voice box abandoned me
My bones enervated suddenly
I hear no footstep or any noise
The place is hushed and so I peeked
Nightmare met me, he is too near
He raised the bat then jeered
Meters to inch within a second
From my frontal, blood drifted
I feel the pain; ‘think it is my end
I waited but why can’t I be dead
The bat fiercely moves up and down
Repeatedly reached my skin and bones
I felt indignant I do not deserve one
I just finished the job started by some
I am terrified and so I hastily awoke
I wobbled, I cried; I am terribly stuck
Euthanasia, I should not have done it
Every minute you’re piercing my heart
In mind's castle many furnished rooms
In upper chamber, chaste virtue grooms
In lower chamber, strands of civility bloom
In antechamber, auxiliary dreams, visions illume
In the inner chamber, fears, insecurities subsume
In dim, adjoining corridors, venal guile do entomb
From bed chamber, hypothalamus, carnal libations spoon
In library, Prefrontal cortex, sentient patterns resume
In nursery, hippocampus, Id suckles the womb
In hearth's cozy fireplace, nurtured Ego swoons
From dusky, dank cellar, hidden desires fume
In dungeon's dark recesses resides a foreboding gloom
In courtyard, amygdala, aesthetic designs mushroom
smooth and dark, work to soothe
hungered beast of cacaoed consumption
a lingual lust if you must, satisfy it just
because your hyper hypothalamus
demands the maximus
ingest it now - s-l-o-w-l-y
glossy, glassy, shiny, dark,
a bit of sweet-treat classy
feel the soothe, feel the spark
sense your buds, tongue the taste
slide it's buttered coco paste
beckon for a second, devour by the hour,
the tasteful, graceful, inverse of sour
smooth and dark, work to soothe
truly, who doesn't wholly approve
an aperitif well beyond vermouth of
chocolate confectioned sweetened tooth?
© Goode Guy 2012-11-21
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