Electric Razor Poems | Examples


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The thing about killing Angels
you have to remember is always go for the kill shot
Most of them can easily take a grenade to the face
Those arch ones usually stay put and watch
Basically on tap with God
Seldomly they will make an appearance
Demons are tricky
Disguise themself basically animal vegetable mineral
One time my electric razor tried to bite a clump from my cheek, huh still makes me smile
He turned towards the boy
His crumple of a face
grimacing
The book boy learn it well

He turned hunched over
Bent and snatched the head from
the prone child at his feet

The sack boy open it
Without the head
We won’t be fed….

The boy pulling a single golden strand from his pocket
the strand warping reality around it
air forming the sack

Please
Just once
Not a three point shot…

Another 3 seconds he chide only infinity to go
At this rate we will be working long after the end
Categories: electric razor, america, poems,
Form: Free verse

The Ruby-Yacht of Omar Khayam

A tom bell version of "The Rubaiyat of Omar Khayyam";
(In hopes of enticing our beloved Ruby Metzger back to Soup)

Omar K. always
had his way...

Multi-millions
from Arab oil,
He sat back
and self-pampered
He'd never
had to toil...

Money bought
his every whim
Saw an electric razor
that satisfied him

Bought the company,
Went on TV,
to tell the world,
"Hey, I'm rich,
this is Me!!"

One day on "Soup"
By Ruby Metzger,
he found a poem
that pleased him so
He decided he
wanted her
for his home...

Now Ruby had
her own plans
that included not
his "desire glands"

She hated heat
and the world
of sand and oil,
And a society where
women were but property
of men Royal

And camels and goats,
did not her please,
And she really hated
those damn sand fleas

But Omar did
his best to woo
This poetic woman
who's heart was true

Omar bought her
a slendid yacht
One capable of
35 or more knot

But Ruby had the 
final word,
When she told him;
"Boy you're thick!!!
I told you once,
I get sea-sick!!!!"
Categories: electric razor, fantasy, funny, parody, people,
Form: Burlesque


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