Funny December Poems

Giving gifts ~ required boxes are filled ...

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The pink polka-dot nightgown,                     ...

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She opened her gifts on Christmas morn
Beneath the paper, a gift she’d scorn
Lacey Panties unflawed
She thought, "what a tightwad!"
Panties in a wad since they’d been...

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December in the central California mountains
Pine scented air tickles my cheek
Hinting at the peace to be found here
We incautiously wish for the sound of rain
Missing...

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December is approaching with gelid gusts,
soon the candid snow will spread its white blanket
and dominate the lifeless and desolate land;
nevertheless, those pallid swifts with wide...

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Jingle bells my sleigh ride’s broke 
Gaudy gifts for “ice cool” folk 
Diamond pay card season blind
Misspent flurry on mankind!

Date posted : 18 th December...

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Christmas came to the town of Asheville
Each one asked St. Nick for a treadmill
Instead, he gave them bikes
Treating them all like tikes
Then he told them...

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Prancer gave Dasher a poke
It was so hard that he had to soak
His ribs were still sore
As he heads to the door
He pranced to the...

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An elf named Lotty lived in the North Pole, 
in charge of keeping Santa's fire in coal.
He lit, he shovelled, he scooped with delight, 
as...

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Looking back, one thing comes clean-glass clear
you were always there for me subduing every fear.

I tried to do my duty, be a husband strong and...

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S eptember is for me

E leven cute flying bees

P ick the fruit from the big green tree

T he sunflowers need to flee

E verything to be...

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Cockleburs

Small green weeds, 
with little seed pots, 
that stick to your socks. 

They travel with you, 
to the next place, 
that God wants them to...

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Back in the Box

Empty packages, 
lots of paper, 
refolded for another year. 
Saved, again and again, 
generation after generation. 
Traditions, 
slowly getting too old, 
falling...

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Dinner's singing in a cage.

   A feast for me this Christmas Day.

           ...

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One More Delivery

Please wait at the door. 
I told the man holding the package. 
He smiled, 
not unkindly, 
but as patiently as one might expect,...

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