A giant glass of warmed up milk
A great bedtime elixir
Don't know bout you, all my dear dear friends
Prefer pie as a bedtime fixer
Now I know I'm being extremely naughty
But I'm in my eighties, by cracky
Who gives a poop if I'm a contrary old geezer
It's my right I've accepted my fate
Always been known as a sweet old duffer
Time to call a spade a spade
Thought you knew me, sure fooled all youse guys
The crankiest sapien made
My most intimate friends know not to cross me
To feel my wrath would be deadly
They stay clear of any controversial subjects
So they don't make the boat unsteady
At one time in my life it was important to me
To be loved and to have lotsa friends
Not any more just couldn't give two hoots
Eighty and nearing the end
Who knows how much time we all have left
No guarantees we'll even see tomorrow
So from this day forward gonna make my own rules
From now on gonna rest on my laurels
LOL
Where would I be without all my cups of coffee?
Mired in a funk, completely at sea
In fact, I can tell you I would hardly be me
At least not the 'me' that you normally see
I'd be really mean without my dose of caffeine
The crankiest crank the world's ever seen
Why, I'd shout and I'd yell; I'd shout and I'd scream
At those whom I love, the loudest, it seems
I'd take credit for doing what I didn't do
At the slightest offense, I'd try to sue you
For all that you're worth, you stupid, dumb fool
As I cackle the cackle of the wickedest shrew
All this for lack of coffee, the drug I prefer
~ Without which, to reefer I might have to defer
A giant glass of warmed up milk
A great bedtime elixir
Don't know bout you, all my P-Soup friends
Prefer pie as a bedtime fixer
Now I know I'm being extremely naughty
But just turned seventy-eight
Who gives a poop if I'm a contrary old geezer
It's my right I've accepted my fate
Always been known as a sweet old duffer
Time to call a spade a spade
Thought you knew me, sure fooled all youse guys
The crankiest *****sapien made
My most intimate friends know not to cross me
To feel my wrath would be deadly
They stay clear of any controversial subjects
So they don't make the boat unsteady
At one time in my life it was important to me
To be loved and to have lotsa friends
Not any more just couldn't give two hoots
Seventy-eight and nearing the end
Who knows how much time we all have left
No guarantees we'll even see tomorrow
So from this day forward gonna make my own rules
From now on gonna rest on my laurels
LOL
© Jack Ellison 2013
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