Best Turd Poems

I refuse to feel like a turd in the grass
Laying there till I become petrified
No one coming to pick me up
They see me as the low of the low

Laying there till I become petrified
Of no value to anyone else
They see me as the low of...

Continue reading...

Pavement Turd
Brown turd in the sun. Just like the bloody song. Brown turd by the wall. The dog's done a big crap over there. Ready for the unwary. Look at the brown dog turd. It steams in the sun. Freshly laid. Almost a work of...

Continue reading...

[ to the tune of The Lonely Goatherd ]

High on a hill sat a lonely goat turd;
He was by himself ‘cuz the goat was through.
Waiting to be eaten by a gross bird
And recycled, turd times two!

Who comes along, but a fair dung beetle,
On sturdy legs...

Continue reading...

THE TURD STAYED IN
THE TURD STAYED IN
WHILE I WAS THERE FOR AN HOUR
AS IT CAME OUT SLOW AND HARD
MY MOUTH TASTED SOUR

A FART HERE AND THERE
SMELLED UP THE AIR
BUT IT HURT DOWN THERE	
SO I DIDN’T CARE
I COULDN’T HELP THE SMELL
WHEN IT CAME OUT OF MY...

Continue reading...

I almost stepped in some doggy pooh
Would've covered the sole of my shoe
Why can't folk use a scoop
to pick up THEIR dog's poop
Like sensible dog owners will do

It's a good job hubby had his torch - grr dog pooh  its my pet hate!

3/15/19...

Continue reading...

Jack is a cop from Kentucky
smart kinda bloke, very lucky
asked to pick up a turd
driver don't be absurd!
you bag it, I'll tag it you curd


Contest: State limerick poetry contest
Sponsor: Kevin Shaw
Written 17/07/2019...

Continue reading...

[Verse]
High on a hill sat a lonely goat turd;
He was by himself ‘cuz the goat was through.
Waiting to be eaten by a gross bird
And recycled, turd times two!

[Verse]
Who comes along, but a fair dung beetle,
On sturdy legs that were big and strong.
He called to her,...

Continue reading...

There are some very hilarious words
One, in particular, is the funny word "turd"
Where did it originate
Probably in grade eight
When some kid was trying to say the word third...

Continue reading...

Often referred to as the woody core, hemp hurd is the soft inner core of the hemp plant stem. It is highly absorbent and rich in cellulose and great thermal and acoustic properties. The hurd can be used in two different forms:

unsettling words from you...

Continue reading...

There are some very hilarious words
One, in particular, is the funny word "turd"
Where did it originate
Probably in grade eight
When some kid was trying to say the word third...

Continue reading...

Believing and Receiving or Faking and Taking:
Working and Doing or Slacking and Talking:
Raising and Praising or Downing and Cursing
Praying and Relating or Mocking and Dividing:
Living and Giving or Dying and Stealing:
Seeking and Finding or Whining and Crying:...

Continue reading...

There are some very hilarious words
One, in particular, is the funny word "turd"
Where did it originate
Probably in grade eight
When some kid was trying to say the word third...

Continue reading...

.
                    yup
                i'm shut'n 
      ...

Continue reading...

God Help
A turd up the **** ready to go
To be dropped like a bomb
On target down below obliteration
Feel it in the tubes free fall death
Don’t wanna be under it oh no
No bomb ever made compares
To my butt turd just to launch
Countdown begins to go go!
My...

Continue reading...