Lonely Goat Turd
[ to the tune of The Lonely Goatherd ]
High on a hill sat a lonely goat turd;
He was by himself ‘cuz the goat was through.
Waiting to be eaten by a gross bird
And recycled, turd times two!
Who comes along, but a fair dung beetle,
On sturdy legs that were big and strong.
He called to her, yes, he softly wheedled,
“Baby, won’t you dance along?”
Then they danced through the meadow.
Then they rolled down the hill.
He fancied he was her beau
Man, this was such a thrill!
She took him back to her hidey-hidey,
Shaping up to be a dream come true!
When she trimmed him down ‘cuz he was too widey,
finally, he thought to think it through.
Now he’s the meal of a fair dung beetle;
Kids came home and had a snack or two.
And he’s kinda wishing he’d been eaten by that eagle;
At least with one bite it would be through!
Copyright © Jeff Kyser | Year Posted 2022
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