Best Slaw Poems
Oh, take me to the bucket in the sky,
where smells of fast food cooking tantalize -
a poultry paradise where no birds fly,
but come instead with biscuits, slaw, or fries . . .
where mashed potatoes may not be homemade,
but people seem to like them anyway.
They scarf them down with coke or lemonade
or mugs of root beer sometimes if they stay,
for you can order in or carry out.
You get your pick of many things to eat.
And if you don't like breasts, no need to pout!
Just thank the Colonel. Now they've got REAL meat,
for beef and chicken reign in harmony
since A & W met K.F.C.!
Categories:
slaw, food,
Form:
Sonnet
Tediously bored, Sir Drake
Prolonged afternoon of tea and cakes
Jam coats his chin with gooey paste
A beard of crumbs hangs from his face
His manner somewhat hard to grasp
Small fingers smother giddy laughs.
.
To sup he’d need a tuning fork
to confound the smacks from lamb and pork.
Lanky strands of cabbage slaw.
Gravy splashes grease his jaw
Pastries flurry dandruff flakes
A grubby mess, grandiose Sir Drake
Theodore Aka Teddy Bear
With soggy paws and matted hair
Needs a scrub from his stout chin
to the furry spats about his shins.
Carried off by loving arms
A bath restores his stately charm.
Categories:
slaw, family, children, imagination,
Form:
Couplet
[ to the tune of We’re off to see the Wizard
from the musical Wizard of Oz ]
If you’ve not had fried gizzard,
you’ve never had southern at all.
The same is true of chicken-fried steak
or vinegar-based cole slaw.
If you’ve never tried hot zucchini bread,
banana pudding, pimento spread,
okra, chow chow, turnip greens or cheese straws,
moon pie, sweet tea, shrimp and grits, deviled eggs.
(dum-dum-dum, dum-dum, dum-dum)
If you’ve not had fried gizzard,
you’ve never had southern at all.
Categories:
slaw, food, parody, song,
Form:
Lyric
I suppose struggling bards (such as I) are wont to muse
Upon profound or inane topics to propound our views.
So, it occured to me how baffling the English language could be,
To new arrivals to our shores from international potpourri.
Will he ever master the usage of to, two, tutu and too?
Should he order "coal" or "cole" slaw at his favorite rendevous?
Plane could be a woodworking tool or is it that thing in the sky,
Or something plain and simple or a plain of undulating rye?
He tries to sort out the subtleties of yawl and ya'll,
And the nuances of aunt, ant and if that ain't all,
How can he figure out the use of maul, moll and mall?
Is it a golf ball or a formal ball? 'Tis enough to make him bawl!
He must ever ponder if a yard is three feat or three feet,
And is addled about the use of peek, peak and pique.
Is a pupil a kid in class or something to do with the eye?
Buy, bi, by and bye, now what does each of those imply?
His fear is that he'll never get it write or is it rite or right?
He preys (or prays?) for deliverance from his fearful plight.
Momma mia! He's bewildered and just wants to return home,
To that Eternal City in Italy called Rome (or is it Roam?)!
Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
(© All Rights Reserved)
Categories:
slaw, funny
Form:
Rhyme
I revere the witty verse of Ogden Nash,
Whose versifications are so waggish and brash!
His work elicited from the masses many a guffaw.
Alas, he met his doom after consuming infected slaw!
Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
(c) All Rights Reserved
Categories:
slaw, humorous,
Form:
Clerihew
A is for anchovies,salty little fishes.
B is for blueberries in muffins and sweet dishes.
C is for cabbage,so good for making slaw.
D is for dragonfruit,you can eat it raw.
E is for eggplant,as parmegan delights.
F is for fritters,deep fried apple bites.
G is for gazpacho,chilled soup from Spain.
H is for honey,so good for throat pain.
I is for Indian foods like spicy curry.
J is for jello,simple desserts in a hurry.
K is for kiwi from the land of the sleeping dragon.
L is for lemon to keep digestive juices from lagging.
M is for mushrooms,shitake and morels.
N is for noodles such as macaroni shells.
O is for onions,yellow and sweet white.
P is for peppers,an Italian delight.
Q is for Quiche,an egg dish so mellow.
R is for raspberries,often used in jello.
S is for shrimp,darlings of the sea.
T is for tomato, a fruit it would be.
U is for Uglifruit,sweeter than it's name.
V is for vinegar,pungent not tame.
W is for waffles,a breakfast treat.
X is for xouba sardines found near Crete.
Y is for yogurt, it's all Greek to me.
Z is for zucchini that will make rattatouille.
Versatility and imagination go a long way.
But the right ingredients keep hunger at bay.
for Cyndi's ABC couplet contest
I just happen to love all these ingredients and have at some or other used or eaten almost all of them! I have a talent for fashioning a grand meal out of only a couple of ingredients...I am a good cook...my boyfriend says I am trying to fatten him up!(nobody ever told him to take seconds and thirds!!)
Categories:
slaw, food, sweet, sweet,
Form:
Couplet
In Kurdish
Ashti runahi we bashtirin kare mirowiye
Slaw bu te ,falsefa chibina men
Endame jihana hebina men
Reheti we dermane dilan
Ewelin huzana men pishti hishiaria men
Ez te ebadet dikem .heyata men
Categories:
slaw, peace,
Form:
Free verse
I have this friend not many would have thought I would have he is shall I say not quit clear,
he wears mascara loves to take exlax dosn't like to wear underwear and will only get a french manicure,
I meet him at an all night carwash he had asked me if I could help him clean his carpet,
in his car was a mess kleenex all over the place bags of cotton candy and what look to be old cole slaw still wet,
I was almost afraid to help you see I didn't want to get a rash or any thing,
but I helped any way as we talked I learned he worked in the same division as I did at the D.M.V.
then I noticed who he was you're that guy who was hell bent on breacking up with that girl Catie was that her name?
he said "you were there that day? I thought I was going to a have brain hemorrhage that girls in sain."
when we finished I shook his hand told him my name he said " I'm Tom but my friends call me Angelic"
I'll be calling you Tom, that was three years ago I'm glad we became good friends after all being unclear boy can he sell it.
Categories:
slaw, friendshipme,
Form:
Free verse
Should you awaken in the night in a fog,
Raid the frig, and have yourself a slaw dog!
It will generate sweet dreams during the night,
And you will sleep like a baby until first light.
Categories:
slaw, funny, humorous,
Form:
Rhyme
When I was a kid, the family reunion was the highlight of the year.
Aunts, uncles and dozens of cousins came from far and near,
To meet at Memorial Park to eat, brag and enjoy the fellowship.
I was admonished by Mom to behave and not voice any sassy lip!
The ladies vied with each other to provide jello, cakes and pies,
Pertater salad, baked beans, termaters and heaps of chicken thighs,
Ham, peas and carrots, cole slaw and gallons of lemonade,
And home-made ice cream, the speciality of Aunt Clara, the old maid!
The patriarch of the clan was usually asked to bless the food.
Stomachs growled, flies swarmed, the old geezer wouldn't conclude,
Until his spouse of many years poked him saying, "That's enough!"
Then, all took a seat and elbows flew as they began to stuff!
After the meal was over, old folks would reminisce and muse.
Others found a shady spot to curl up and take a snooze.
Ne'er-do-well Uncle Wilbur would sneak a forbidden nip of booze,
While snobbish Cousin Sarah boasted of her Caribbean cruise!
The kids frolicked on the teeter-totters, swings and slides.
The older ones grabbed bats and balls and chose up sides.
Now I'm the patriarch and am usually called upon to pray,
But I make it snappy so we can get on with fellowship and play!
Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
(© All Rights Reserved)
Entry for Craig Cornish's "The Park" Contest
Categories:
slaw, cousin, old, , memorial,
Form:
Rhyme
Delicious juicy hot dogs
Slathered with mustard,
Onions, slaw, and chili sauce
Some hamburgers, too,
On soft toasted buns
Cheese slices.
Yum!
FIRST PLACE WINNER
Written June 1, 2022
Submitted to "What's Cooking of the Grill This Summer" Poetry Contest
Sponsored by M. L. Kiser
Categories:
slaw, food, summer,
Form:
Epulaeryu
I'm afraid that this poem was too long to post in one part; here's Part 2, full title:
Dragons Make Great Heating Systems
(Until They Discover That There’s More To Life…)
The next month we received two plane tickets, for free,
to go out to old “CA”; his life film to see.
In a bookstore he autographed our copies and then we had tea;
the manager was told, we were his, “Family”.
“Such a gifted young dragon you folks have raised.”
He declared, he shook both our hands and pulled up a chaise.
“You folks have given us all a great gift;
your dragon, his talents, our spirits did lift.”
A free tour of the studio, we got that week and on the weekend,
we went fishing, in dragon's favorite creek.
We got autographed pictures and souvenirs’ galore;
we’d never seen such publicity before.
Back home we flew and to our surprise;
our piano, we heard, was playing inside.
“That piano is ours!” I shouted and rushed through the door;
it was no surprise; I should've known, of course.
There sat our new dragon, playing without any care.
“Welcome home”, he said, “come and see what I’ve prepared”.
He’d cooked up a giant supper, for us to eat;
it included steamed pears, cole slaw and even chipped beef.
Wine he had poured as we took our seats;
such a succulent display of tasty delicacies.
We knew what would happen, as he filled our plates;
when he showed us the cookbook, he’d written, to date.
So just know, if for heat, a dragon you choose;
be prepared with a backup, for he, you will lose.
Especially if his insomnia reigns, if he dreams, is creative;
your life will soon change.
We ate very well for a couple of years;
then our eyes, once again, shed big giant tears.
Here came the plane tickets; we had a great trip.
We toured his studio kitchen; grew larger bellies and hips.
Home once again, we received another treat;
Dragon three’s an inventor, though he can’t boil a beet.
He’s managed to build us a new heating device;
in the summer it cools, like we’re sitting on ice.
It costs nothing to run and dragon three’s fame;
We all celebrated with a glass of champagne.
All the dragons will visit, on the big holidays
and we feel very blessed, that they share our family name.
Categories:
slaw, animal, fantasy, funny, humorous,
Form:
Rhyme
Catfish I love is on a plate
with tartar sauce, french fries, and slaw;
but I despise the type that trolls
online, those pervs who break the law
and tell some trusting kid, “I’m twelve,
like YOU! I live right by the park
near you. Let’s meet there by the bridge.
You’ll be back home before it’s dark.
Don’t tell your mom! If she’s like mine,
she’ll tell you NO. Let’s just sneak out.”
She says, “I’ll go slip out the back.
We’ll have a lot of fun—no doubt!”
The sicko rushed right to the bridge.
The “kid” he met was twenty-five,
an undercover cop with cuffs
and back-up. “Channel 14 LIVE”
rushed in on this newsworthy scene.
A big catfish was caught that day.
Because such wickedness abounds,
not all such stories end this way.
May 15, 2018, entered in Catie Lindsey's Catfish Poetry Contest
Categories:
slaw, evil,
Form:
Rhyme
Delicious fruit so small and sweet
Of red, purple and light green
Seedless, seeded on the vine
Some are for eating
Others just for wine
Chill them add them
To an iced drink
Make sure you
Wash them well
In the kitchen sink
Juice them squish them
Eat them raw
Cut them up
Serve them in
Cold fruit slaw
What a gift
Of sweet candy
I just think
Grapes are just dandy
Categories:
slaw, fruit,
Form:
Bio
Because of you
we can get up every morning
and go to work
run errands at lunch time
drive through McDonald’s
fill up our gas tanks
and make it back to work
just in time
Because of you
we don’t have houses
we have homes
where we walk through the door
the dog jumps on us
as do our children
we hug our spouses
and smell dinner cooking
Because of you
we have artwork from Kindergarten
and shopping lists
hanging on the refrigerator
along with pictures held up with tape or magnets
school pictures, pictures of Gramma and Grampa
pictures of babies, kittens, and teenagers
dressed for the prom
Because of you
we gather around the dinner table
play in the backyard with our kids
feed the cat, walk the dog
splash water on our children in the tub
then tuck them into bed with hugs and kisses
and reassurance there are no monsters
in closets or under beds
Because of you
with the children asleep
and the dishes all done
men make love to their wives
wives make love to their husbands
and drift off to sleep intertwined
feeling life is good, all is well
and we are safe
Because of you
we are safe
we can sit in fields watching our kids play soccer
or in the stands watching our kids play hockey
we can grill hamburgers and hot dogs
eat potato salad and cole slaw
drink ice cold beer
and play pool while the kids run through sprinklers
Because of you
we must remember
to have a moment of silence on Memorial Day
to remember your sacrifice
and your family’s
and to thank you that we get to live these lives
sometimes eventful, sometimes uneventful
but always full of possibilities
Because of you
Categories:
slaw, america, appreciation, hero,
Form:
Free verse