Best Recovery From...Death Poems
I WAS TALKING TO GOD:
I am a downright failure,
I never get to the point at any time.
I am screwed up,
It’s of no use to try now.
The world, for me, is now above.
It’s worthless to try,
Why did I aim too high?
I am now scarred,
With the failures I have gained,
It has made me weak, and it has pained.
All my plans have gone in vain,
My head is down, down into shame.
Its worthless to try,
Why did I aim too high?
I aimed for the moon,
But never even reached the star.
Was thrown from above,
Because I was a pea out there
Nobody loved me, nobody cared.
Its worthless to try,
Why did I aim too high?
Due to this failure,
I have climbed the barrier of lunacy,
I have travelled in the wave of despondency.
I shout from here, to take me away from this world,
Because it is no less than a prison for me.
Its worthless to try,
Why did I aim too high?
I am sick of confusions,
I have gone insane,
I am tired of playing mind games.
The world has done much for me,
And I don’t have anything to give in return.
I just want to give it up,
I am burning up,
Let me go from this world.
Its worthless to try,
Why did I aim too high?
BUT Then GOD Said:
That aiming too high,
Is so not wrong.
You moan and scream,
and show the world that you are so very meek,
You decide to die, every time you fail,
So what can I say!!
Now you have decided to die,
What can I do, give death a try.
I REALISED and SAID TO GOD:
You have sarcasm in your voice.
You give me options – death and life as a choice?
You say that I am meek,
And I prove myself,
MYSELF as a freak?
Oh God! Now I feel I was so wrong!
Why was I moaning for so long!
This sardonic and challenging response of yours,
Makes me feel challenged,
And makes me forget whatever I said before.
I feel energetic again,
And take up this challenge of yours.
I would dare to dream big,
And would not fear to get it fulfilled.
No one is going to stop me,
I have got the optimism installed!
God, give me challenges,
Give me dares,
I want to show you,
I am not the person
Who screams and scares.
Every time I fail,
I would remember your sarcastic voice,
And would feel challenged again.
I saw death in the face of the viper
The day he broke my heart
Deep inside I know he set you free
Sang the Meadow Lark
Another I do! Another pledge
The treacherous viper wore the same black suit
He wore the colors of devil’s cape the second time around
Because strait is the gate and narrow is the way
His face shines as he fake a smile
A sort of camera pose,
I saw death in his face and Pinokio nose
The well-wishers whisper “no taste
What a disgrace! , what a waste!
A pitiful image of a man
The pastor sadly said Amen!
I saw death upon the face of the haunted soul
The cracks in the old brick wall whistle a tune
“Thou stand before the alter another fool”
A wedding or a funeral an evening of doom!
The middle-aged groom
The love, kindness in him decline.
Love is blind.
I speak of pain without external scars
I speak of loss for treasured things
I speak in the silence of my broken heart
The me I hold against all that tears it apart.
You think I am whole
Because I nurture everyone to be
More than moon and drinker of the harsh indifferent sun
I teach them how to pull tides up
Change seasons, set the dark alight
Because wholesome deeds take not whole our strength
Or should I better say this another way
Pain is fuel in the fired clay
I speak of pain deflating dreams and self
I have pain for my brother and brethren gone
Meteorites of my unlit dawn
Nagging pebbles gnawing me in the shoe
Pearls I could have spent brimming my manliness
I speak of pain you cannot tell is there
Every death is hard to bare
But harder still my sibblings lost to me
In a fatherless world, without compass to maturity.
I speak of pain from ancient wars
My sisters were richest part of life
One place a whole cross on me, and I had to walk with it
It is so I love amidst the ebb and flow of adversity
I cannot wince, I am nailed to suffering's humility.
I speak of pain a million ways to feel
To dry a mother drenched in dreadful poverty
While ever drowned in sorrows tears
Amidst the frantic failures and fizzled repairs
The family like a shattered glass, that special souvenir
Becoming spites splints for bare susceptible feet
There is no pain deep as these
The magma boiling in the plugged up heart
I speak of pain from cruel loss
Friends fallowed into dry dead grass
Ambition like candle fat ground into the carpet clammy with dust
I speak of pain in love
Yet only once I love, and still no love its loyalty denied
When all the worldly value my peace could not abide
I suffer still and but to silence confide
The torture of my indomitable will, refusing death like a cup of gall
I speak of pain, the whole legacy of Adam's wounding fall
I make my rainbow with my tears
And turn the volume of my prayers up
To mute the scoffers, and the liars, and the jeers
I drink my joy from a promised cup
A wedding supper that challenges me with gender switching meanings
And yet I am secure
That nothing earthly may heal again my stagnant sore
I speak of pain I feel
From the hahazard day of grunting, groaning birth