Best Off Your Rocker Poems

You might take this with a grain of salt
Knowing I heard it on the grape vine
Why they let the cat out of the bag
I'd say your guess is as good as mine

They say I tend to sit on the fence,
Off my rocker by not a...

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Charles Darwin
was a margin
off his rocker when he, ashamedly,
got caught swinging from a tree....

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An event I have to tell you about was a rather embarrassing occasion for me,
But they say laughter is one of life’s best medicines, so I’ll share it with you happily.

One morning I was getting dressed and got down on my knees to look in...

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In the larger view I'm the better cook.
Some folks can hardly boil water.
They'll take a recipe by the hand
and lead it straight to slaughter!

Yet I don't need a recipe.
My hands and mind are strong.
If you let me taste your dish you'll see
I'll capture it like...

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All right, no more Abecedarian again!
Buzz off,
Cut me some slack,
Dogging me,
Entrapping me with a 
Form of poetry I am not
Good at,
Hamilton!
I entreat you
Jot down some other forms that won’t
Knock me off my rocker, like
Lyric, Limerick or Lay on
Myth and Mystery,
Narrative, Ninette or Nonet,  
Ode,...

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(literary nonsense)
the winter was so long ago, burying the world in snow
rabbits hop where rabbits go, here i sit to-night
and the day i hath long dreaded which hath left me much beheaded
worn my sanity unthreaded as i sought the sun's warm light
said the rabbit, hopping...

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" Rime of the Ridiculous Mariner "

{warbled to the Merry Tune: Jingle Bells!}

Jingle Bells & Flyin' Hulls
All sheets in so tight~
Yikes Ahoy! There's the ploy!
Sail right through this night!

Run downwind beat to weather
fall off as ye wish~
Set your mizzen up yer main
tops'ls catch all flyin'...

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Grandma's rocker
Grandma would sit on her rocking chair 
Rocking all day long.
The chair was her joy each day.
As she grows old.
She loved to rock on the porch.
As the car drove by she would smile.
Now the rocker is old.
It sets in the cold of the day.
Now...

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Through the door, Uncle Ben came in
Of course he is Aunt Sue's honey
Years ago, she dropped Sloppy Joe
And not just because of money!

They brought with them, their Baby Ruth
Upstairs is her real Papa, John
Notice how Ginger snaps at all,
It's not Shirley Temple she's on!

Now you...

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YOU MUST BE IRISH

March on                               into the greenness of March!
Charming and idyllic —  ...

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Isaac Bartholomue Riley,
His friends just call him " Ike",
Jane, his wife, they call "Smiley",
He got five other writes on this site.

October 12th I met this fellow,
A pleasant find in two thousand nine,
in a hospital in Monticello,
on the mend and trying to unwind.

He called himself "stalker...

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Release me woman from this prison you have me in.  Fighting your love has been a 
battle I can't seem to win.  I catered to your every need.  Followed your lead, and you had 
me believe all was well.  You look...

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An Idiomatic Chicken Tale

Don’t count your chickens before they hatch,
you may bite off more than you can chew.
But if you do count, make sure you have
a bird in the hand rather than two in the bush.

When counting don’t put all of your eggs in one...

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it's difficult / yoursatisfaction / set out to succeed based on medical reaction ------
LAUGHTER IS THE CURE!! / the world --- to the god --- is but annoyance / itch /
turning the fur. _______ / your bane = my beauty. just let me remind you...

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I looked away and tried to shake her. I can't really describe what I  felt in her presence. In 
fact,  if it was a feeling I was experiencing, it felt great .  But there she was anyway…smiling 
and kind of bubbly I...

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