Best Mortician Poems

The Secret of the Mortician

Dead, but I got eyes
Prepares my body at the morgue
Opens the chest
Drains the blood from its nudity
Admires my body before it decays

After The process of embalming
His hands run all over
I'm still dead
He's satisfied

The next day 
Writes an outstanding obituary 
I sit...

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The lighting - it was over-bright
above the table where she lay,
her skin dead cold but lovely white.
The lighting -it was over-bright,
He loved work best alone at night.
With corpses he could have his way.
The lighting - it was over-bright
above the table where she lay.

Written June 19,...

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"I tie the shoelaces together on my dead," says my local mortician, 
"because if a zombie apocalypse were ever to happen,
 it will most certainly be an hilarious situation."...

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Soo surprising
my god
Its never black and white
they are all frauds
the medium says you can tell me something
but what does the crystal ball really have to say?
a key to the fairytale and something you are trying to say

Here it is detective
Here is those that...

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The lighting, it was over-bright
She seemed to merely be at rest

I'd made her up just right despite
the lighting (it was over-bright!)

When caught in a carress, one might
need not confess but ought suggest

the lighting. It was over-bright
...She seemed to merely be at rest

======================...

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Nightly in the mirror she would stare, 
and pull out clumps of her own hair.
Wigs she wore during the day,
while doing things her way.

Neighbors said the way she walked, 
the way she talked was very creepy.
For quite some time she was able to maintain,
the fact...

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So, this is it then, no Borealis
How abysmal the beginning is
After that climax of wondering
Comes just this, this replica.

Thoughts keep me company, still yet
Make all the memories go, go, go!
Incessant replays with constant reverb
Strike the fork and see where it bounces

I think my skin is...

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All hail the village mortician
  his bearing, proper patrician

Sterling the gent's reputation
  throughout his chosen vocation

A man of dignity and reserve
  whose stare can a ghost unnerve

Frankly, he makes me quite nervous
  though one day I'll be needing his service...

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Much finer than she was battling with death, 
Nicer than when she had survivor’s breath
Returned to her hurt face the freshest health;
Like one who’d begun anew to test wealth…

Twenty-One Gun Salute to Mortician: 
For Morticians I’d turn a musician
In all my songs rank one Perfect...

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maybe mortician 
as well as politician
are ammunition

destruction at lid
accurately measure grid
of things we forbid

when we will mingle
those with disease out single
should see my shingle

real quiet and cute
she has learned how to commute
is not destitute

we must invade scene
need an airborne vaccine
for each king and queen

should fear...

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What be Ye, Preacher or Mortician?

A mortician prepares and buries the remains.
The hole he or she digs is for a lifeless corps, free of soul.
And the eulogy is of poppies and the utterance of past misdeeds restrained.

A preacher lifts and builds the spirit with truth.
The...

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Even with death
The Man’s gotta bargain a price

So I suppose that’s why that fat a** mortician
As a sales technique
Made my wife and I pick who gets to sit
From the one available chair
In his lavender lobby
For a full hour the morning after

Before he bothered to waddle...

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Our morticians are thanking their god
For a year where they all earned a wad
Though some were burnt
Many more weren't
Still, their best work lies under the sod!...

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Ahead of a just fixed funeral
He'd started counting its numeral:
Negotiator of the fairest price.
For twenty five bags of Thailand Rice...

Negotiator meets, too, Mortician
And relates to him as Beautician:
One is as good as partaker,
Who goes around as undertaker
"Well, he's for badly frowning corpses
Owners pay thousands for...

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Where there's a will
there's a funeral
death is a fact of life
a grave undertaking
for a mortician
and one day some day
you and I
will wake up dead
hopefully the lifetime led
was of our own making
too late for looking back
no regrets and yet
it's appalling
when we wind up
in a winding sheet
waiting...

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