Best Lard Poems

Lockdown Lard

Ok, so let’s address the elephant in the room
And the issue that does loom
That most of us face
Of our exuberant tastes
That has led to …lockdown lard!

Since March, life for everyone has been difficult and hard
And we have all had to play our part
In keeping...

Continue reading...

    Pickles in tea
      black beans with cheese
    Surely no way to
      a man's appetite please

    Carrots in lard
      cornbread that’s...

Continue reading...

Everybody thinks I'm weird because I only eat lard.
The doctors tell me that my arteries are getting hard.
I don't consume vegetables, fruits, bread or meat.
People call me crazy because lard is all that I eat.
My days of eating lard will never come to an end.
Why...

Continue reading...

Trump Lump of Lard Horn Haiku

Trump sure is old grump;
Broke ankle slipping on stump,
With lard a big lump.

Jim Horn...

Continue reading...

After cautiously drawing another card,
Have heard that old habits do die hard;
Us likes to whip;
Give us the slip;
Trump's brain is like a lump of lard.

Jim Horn...

Continue reading...

Trump Looked Like Lump of Lard

Trump looked like a big lump of lard,
No longer soft but he appeared hard;
Hickory to dickory,
And also slippery;
We did need to destroy and discard.

Jim Horn...

Continue reading...

HE LAUGHED AT MY TEARS
AND CRIED WHEN I WAS HAPPY
HE SMILED WHEN I WAS ANGRY
AND THROW RICE WHEN
SHE REJECTED ME
SHE LIKED HIS STYLE
AND TOOK A LIKING TO HIM
WHAT HAD BEEN BETWEEN US
WAS ALL THEN RUINED
SHE ENJOYED THE LAUGHTER
WHEN OTHERS LAUGHED WITH HIM
THEY TARGETED MY SUFFERING
AND...

Continue reading...

A Pound of Bacon
David J Walker

Think of this
As you think of that 
The frying pan seems to be 
The logical plan to burn fat 

And I get the obvious connection
To my affection for bacon 
juxtaposed 
To my burgeoning belly 

But - - -  think...

Continue reading...