It has been 9 months since your sudden disappearance.
That Hallowed night when your 5’11” nerd aura
Handed me my early birthday gift
A cold shoulder wrapped in a velvet bow
Made in Sri Lanka, sold exclusively at the Dollar Store
That was your appraised value.
But, today, revival’s whisper enters my gently waxed earlobes.
Candy coated revelations
For my allergic blood
“I said yes!”, as she flashed Cracker Jack ring
Filled with Monopoly dollar signs and “Go directly to Jail” Chance cards
I almost applauded, my hands sarcastically never connected
While my eyeballs rolled in epileptic banter
We scream in misguided nerd joy
As if we witnessed Monty Python & Darth Vader having a make-out session
Sudden urges to watch movies about Traveling Pants & Sisterhood
And PSing my I Love You
While we eat Dark Chocolate Klondike bars and Chipwich Ice Cream Cookies
My ovaries were bursting with INSANITY’S JOY!
But, WAIT, I quickly realized I didn’t have such parts!
It was then, reality crashed
As if Spider Man ran out of web during mid-air leap
My essence now halts at crossroads’ throat.
To my left, “celebration”
To my right, “other”
I chose to be a human this night.
Current time- 9:15pm
Current location- Reception Hall
A 5 course meal,
Including dinosaur shaped chicken nuggets
Smiley face French fries
And 3 glasses of Tang
Surrounded my space on the dinner table
Heavenly echoes of forks & glass,
Ringing in ignorant unison,
Give birth to Tinnitus in my drums
In their 9 months of togetherness,
They kiss with forcible ease,
Frogs refusing to show their true form
It is then, ignoring listless stares from guests,
I stood up holding my half-empty Tang glass
Which MIGHT have contained a smidge of Grey Goose
At the TOP of my LUNGS,
“Friend, I should be so proud of you. I would. I could.
You never responded to my open-hearted palm.
You left my vulnerabilities dangling at half-mast, as if I lost our final game of Hang Man.
But, TONIGHT, it is I & this delicious Dinosaur nugget that will HAVE a final say!
You are impeccably flawed, like I. But, I still wanted you to be a part of my tomorrows.
Yet, you turned me into a muted yesterday.
So, I will wish congratulations on your new slav…um, husband,
Pouring this glass of yummy Tang onto this stapled dance floor in a straight line
Each drop will be a symbol of how many tears he will shed, before that line is crossed.”
As silence slapped each other in its face
Across candle flame blanketed, marble dance hall,
With children pointing & laughing hysterically,
“Security” enters the room
As I hold hands with Cuban female rent-a-cop, her head warming my shoulder,
“Thank you for these 9 months. For now, I have given birth to a new me.
The Best Man that you will never hold again.”
©Drake J. Eszes
Copyright © Drake Eszes | Year Posted 2013
Disappearing: A List
• Leave for no destination in particular.
• Plastic surgery.
• Burn my wallet and shoes.
• Buy or steal an identity;
• Run into the forest,
wear a wolf’s skin,
look and smell
• Yield my being in
an intimate exchange,
to the thrall of
scotch or peyote or cocaine
or intense pleasure or pain.
• Be subsumed into the
collective mind of a cult
or the Secret Service
or the Carthusians
• Become young rather than old.
• Die, just because.
It’s just a list of possibilities.
Not a complete one at that.
Copyright © Jack Jordan | Year Posted 2013
This time never seem to come
but right from the beginning
it stood by the door
and never knocked.
Nearer it comes
but acting like a mirage
allowing me privileges,
and Life itself.
Is it the Joy
of having new friends and family?
Or drinking from the cup
of new acquaintances?
Is it the adventure
of a different environment?
And its ability to
create a new personality in me?
I'll surely miss them all
and all that took part
in making my completeness a reality.
I divide my heart into six portions
to my friends,
who are a bridge
to where I am today
and served as the paddle
for my sail to greatness.
to my instructors,
both great and small
who showed me the path
with less thorns and stones
and opened my eyes
to see beyond the hill.
to my 'dears'
who balanced my Life
and made my manly wholeness
to simple familiarities
who shared the fruit of life
from a distance
and protected our respect
like a new born child.
who trippled the magnitude of my consciousness
and are always down the cliff
when I'm about to fall.
Irrespective of their motive
have kept my reputation
as strong as the toughest compounds of carbon.
you make me stay in the right path
and refrained me
from crossing the thin line
between fantasy and reality.
Notwithstanding your contempt
my love for and to you remains
bountiful and pure.
Goodbyes are the hardest words
But your smiles
are in my genes,
your helping hands,
make up my memories.
And your love is what I see
when my eyes stay closed.
Though we say goodbyes now
I'll always carry you along
wherever I go.
In tears, I say..................
I MISS YOU SO DEARLY.
Copyright © Funom Makama | Year Posted 2013
Enjoy our parting day
the young girl child,
now full-grown wise Elder,
the brother she had taught to flex male muscle
without overbearing her Sister Gaia powers.
On this classic sun-baptizing fragrant May morning,
reflecting this same gently caressing day I was born
into earlier centuries of flowering cultures,
she prepares to leave me
as the length of our pilgrimage together
grows long enough to tip more poignant hello
into operatic final exit goodbyes.
I remember what I might have felt at two,
when she joined me
inviting me into our special shared world,
loving our polycultural identities,
nondual twins since infant-fairy magic,
not having previously known
how lonely love is without her.
Now, to stare remaining years ahead
without seeing and feeling her morning through evening present voice,
facing my own ecology of each Ego identity dying alone,
inevitably without her, or anyone,
dying without incarnate memories
of unconditionally cooperative love.
at two or three,
toddling outdoors in my most terrifying wild ways
exploring gardens and barns
chickens and pigs and milkcow domesticated wildness,
and returning to your crib to report back
all these wonderful worlds we would welcome
if you could only learn to walk and talk
I need not say farewell
as I learn to see forward as dying
into these deep rich memories
of learning to walk and talk with Sister Gaia's Welcome,
yet sometimes tipping, Wagon.
disappears as we stop over-investing in dominant negative
Yang, outweighing Yin's more integrally inclusive flow powers,
politically and economically,
personally and as a species,
intergenerationally and cross-culturally
now under-invested in multiculturing mutual-equity cooperative investments.
What is our mutual time-investment balance on this farewell date?
Do our mutual equity values line up, match, balance, absorb any lifetime losses?
Sister Gaia's regenerative trends
grow ever deeper cooperative equity-reinvestment designs,
policies and procedures for further self and other development
through EarthTribe Revolutions,
WinWin Life as LoveGame Health Theory.
We give evil, dissonant farewells,
nondual negative Janus-faces of Yang/Yin imbalance,
by seeing these toxins and poisons
and personifications of DeviL,
as other than absence of good
Yang/Yin balanced nutritional Co-Creation Stories.
This Final Farewell Memory
Earth's Embryonic UnFolding
of Love as stretching BiLateral Time's Black Hole
(0)Rigin Tipping MidWay ReVolutions
Yang(+) = Yin(-,-)
ThermoDynamic Prime Eulerian Co-ReGenerative Universal Function
Intelligent ZenZero Tao-Balanced fractal RNA-iconic-ionic enlightenment
as Time's bilaterally unfolding regenerate matters
of EarthTribe's healthy enculturating-revolving futures.
remembering my original embryonically environmental Hello,
Here We Are
incarnating in and out,
back and forth,
up as down,
Yang-out as Yin-in.
While Autumn farewell bears time's reputation for messy falls from grace,
this is prophesied in spring seedling beginnings
bearing message memories merging coarising births
of EarthTribe multigenerational,
His/Her Creation Story,
coarising nondual identities,
within Earth's ecology of regenerate-revolving design,
culturally deep enriching outcomes,
by turning down RightFisted AnthroSupremacy
to balance Left/Right Zero-Centric EcoSystemic Investment
and divestment, double-negative equivalent
WinWin DiPolarity Outcomes
ReGenerate Network Game Theory Development
from BiLateral-Temporal Prime Relational (0)-FractalFunction.
Enjoy this parting day
I have so loved beginning again together,
our mutually co-invested Creation Story.
Enjoy our continuing
final farewell day.
Copyright © Gerald Dillenbeck | Year Posted 2016
You said you got my back
But when i turn around i see no one
You promised to make me special
But am feeling so cheap,damn am on special
You thought you love me perhaps
But now am drinking a litre per-herbs
Shit felt like you stabbing my heart and now it disturbs
The blood flow now my heart is leaking
So i thought i should just write a poem
So ama transport the food myself cause iam my own tube phloem
Neglected my friends and family so it was only just us two
Even got your name on my skin in a form of a tattoo
Die for you? oh yes i would have done that too
Am gone now
Wont even turn back
I'm scared of wrong turns
You watched me as the sun-burns
My forehead,heavy stuff on my mind shit feels like i have four heads
I guess i slept like a log and i just woke up in the fire place
You expected me to fold myself in half like a brief-case
I was going to brief you about the case
But now i finally stood up
Hold myself together mybe am bio
Five fingers in the air including the palm,bye yooo
Copyright © Tom D Le Poet Le Poet | Year Posted 2014
This morning when I woke up in an unfamiliar place, dark and empty.
There were no doors, no windows I was trapped.
No light, I could not see.
No air, I could not breathe.
I cried out for help, no one could hear me.
Alone and smothering as the rhythm of my heartbeat grew weak until there was no beat.
The glimpse of my soul once filled with vibrant life now fades away as dark as the place I find myself.
Wait this in not a room,
Wait this is not a place.
But, this is my world without you.
Dark, empty, alone and hurting.
I am alone in the dark
A shadow covers the beam that once lite up my life,
My heart is empty,
My dreams shattered,
This is my world without YOU!
Copyright © Patricia Mitchell-Nunn | Year Posted 2014
YOU SLY DOG
I saw you standing there all alone.
I came over to see where you ready to move on.
You said you were just shooting the breeze.
I left without thinking that you probably were deceiving me.
You arrived home about ten.
You pull yours shoes off as you were kissing me.
Never did I expect that you had not been doing anything but what you said.
I told you to get you something to eat so that we could go to bed.
Morning came and nightfall and this behavior continued.
We would spend time together and talk.
Wednesdays were your night for personal space.
If I came across you, I found you always standing in the same place.
Today I found you out.
You are a sly dog and contrite.
You are a cheat.
I want you out of my life.
You sly dog.
You ain't lucky at all.
Copyright © Verlena S. Walker | Year Posted 2014
milestones are marked by photographs
by notches on door casings that show just how grown up we are getting
by midnights spent on front porch stoops with people we only half know drinking mixtures that taste as awful as they should but let the words and movements come fast and steady knowing that it's the only time loose lips are the only things sinking ships
We were children growing up in the backseats of parents who rarely spoke to each other
the children who blossomed into the worst love poems we only pretended to read
As children we played games in the backseat
middle seat smash
guess which song
then, sometime during the middle of awkward slow dances with fresh braces and clothes our parents picked out we stopped getting up early in the morning
we stopped counting down the days until christmas
we started playing games in the backseat
feet tucked or feet spread
windows down or windows steamed
that time changed from clueless to reckless to clothesless lasts only the length of a song
the radio cuts out in some spots around French Hill but still plays Freshman by The Verve Pipe
as we close our eyes
breath fluttering like heartbeats
we were no longer children
not yet adults but we knew every line to every song we liked and we knew the most honest places we had and what happened when we held our breathe for too long during the bass line
Copyright © K.M North | Year Posted 2015
It is unspoken
me in my rocking chair
and you -so calm and temperate
the same question every night
your answer belated
but it’s alright, I know you’ll be back.
I can’t force myself to be forthright
but this excruciating pain overtakes me
this malady I cannot escape
I let it be, for you always come back.
It is a sign of how far we’ve gone
when you are belied by my smile
and you don’t notice my crestfallen glance
I focus on swallowing, and avert my eyes.
When you return,
you’d kiss my check
murmur your apology
give a specious reason
turn away, and head to bed alone
your muscles are taut when you say goodbye
I nod, and note the time.
“be safe,” I whisper, voice dry and small.
I wait for you to leave, then wait for you to return.
but you didn’t. Not that night. Nor the next.
Never allowing any thoughts to
gestate in my mind,
You wouldn’t leave.
Even if I had become different.
I could weather through this.
but I didn’t.
I remained there, waiting, like always.
slowly wasting away
and I closed my eyes for a moment
shutting the vision of the trash can out
the one with blood stained tissues.
July 9th, 2015
Copyright © Bre Varzena | Year Posted 2015
I am what you call a hopeless
But im also a lost lovers cause, my
heart belongs to another
Yet in my head a love triangle starts
to form, the girl I love doesn’t love
She holds the heart to another and
mine caged to the floor,
She isn’t afraid to fight for what she
wants, not even when it comes to
leaving another man torn
Trust me she’s happy, as that boy
holds her heart ever so close
Seeing what I shouldn’t I smile as I
wear my blind fold,
Blind to everything around, lifeless
staring into air
My train of thought running so fast,
the second I stop you’ll hear a crash
Derailing my hope, for ever finding a
love so pure & rare
Wishing I could hold the hand of the
lover who stole my flame,
Wish I could change the last days in
which we parted ways,
Realizing now that we can never be
Finally saying it out loud as tears run
down my face
You stole my happiness, as I walked
away that day
But it’s because as of what you said
I guessed I changed,
Now every relationship has just be
No one can seem to bring back that
Because a love likes ours comes
once in a lifetime
Well at least it does to me,
But I mean you’re happy with who
I mean I only wrote this as I heard
exchanging “I love you” flow from
each of your lips.
Copyright © Mark Ramon | Year Posted 2013
Tocando puertas; una vez más,
Agrietando los fragmentos existentes,
Ahí; no llueve sobre el mar.
Alzando coros de preguntas,
Indigestando; nacen los sentimientos,
Lágrimas, sutiles notas en el aire.
Buscando; café en la cuidad,
Ahogando en silencio las respuestas,
Abriendo rocas; desesperado.
Uniendo instantes olvidados;
Lejos del fuego sofocante,
Ignorando gritos; constantemente.
Eliminado al Ego de alimento,
Tacto elocuente, inalcanzable;
Encontrando estrellas en tu ojos.
Destellos de nada; Absolutamente,
Aparentes reflejos de sol; callado,
Esperando por ti. Una vez más.
Copyright © John Tyler Kafman | Year Posted 2016
Love can overwhelm so quickly
It can make you act silly
Only time spent will tell what is to be
I wanted love
That highest of human emotion
But a brother I was to you
Our friendship which I nurtured and grew so carefully
Scattered to the wind so quickly
It crumbled with a soul wrenching ferocity
That leaves my heart heavy
A heavy price for my greed I paid
I now brood in dark despair
Displaying my sorrow for all to see
The embarrassment of showing my hand
And the rejection of wanting more is too hard to bear
I want to fade away
And sleep for eternity
In the graveyard of actions
That brought nought but misery
I will always remember how I held you dear
I wanted more so I could always keep you near
It was more than anyone or you ever dared
I wish you well
My longed for
My forever I will yearn for friend
The seed that was planted
Gave life to a relationship
That matured too early
And is now no more
I wish for chances anew
But I know I will never want anything
But all of you
Always dear to me you will be
But I have no choice but
To set you and me free
From a friendship wrecked by me
Copyright © evrod samuel | Year Posted 2013
I still think why things had ended
between our love, which I now try to hate,
I succumbed myself into this despair
of wanting you back, which you also hate.
Psyche oneself that I can make it
this lonely battle of heart, can i fake it?
repeatedly in disarray thoughts
God I hope I could say it's just a hoax.
People around, will you please tell me
is it wrong to fight for this love I believe?
or shall I say is it right to surrender
because it's something merely perceived.
Ya, Ya, Ya, I did get it
don't insist no more, got it?..
Copyright © Anna Lo | Year Posted 2012
over you am hurt too
this i can say
i love you anyway
hard to carry own
you did me wrong
my love can;t stop
my eyes or like
Copyright © kurtis scott aka curtis futch jr | Year Posted 2013
What am I supposed to think? What am I supposed to say? All these lies you bottled up come sweeping, crashing with the tides. My footing's gone, the ocean real, but how am I supposed to feel? And here I am, a drowning mess, a loveless lie, I do protest. And here I am a drowning mess. So all those things you said to me? Where they just lies out of pity? So all those things you said to me? Or am I lost in salty waves? Yes I know my future's grave. Or am I lost in salty waves?And now the panic in my head, when I should be tucked up in your bed, reels and reels right here instead.I'm going down, a sinking ship, funny what name drips off my lips. It is not God, or Angles plenty, or even that I'm just damn ready To let go of the hell and the lies. I'm wishing for your gentle eyes. Or at least the way they always seemed, but perhaps that's just this salty dream. I have no clue what I'm to do! A drowning hopeless mess, for you-- think it's cute, and oh so funny, but here's the bitter truth now honey. I'm going down. There is no help. I can't be saved by God himself. I put my life, my whole world of trust, and you've thrown it away for lust. Well what the hell's a girl to do? I'm just so entranced by you!
Copyright © Erika Raiken | Year Posted 2012
Goodbye hey you!
In front the blade of fear
My words so weak to pass,
through my throat.
I am afraid they'll grant you stigma
If I didn't mention your names
I have no light
While the movements of your shades
Flowing from stone to another
You who in front of me
Had let me down
The luck, the mind and
the heart which was lost
I became! Afraid of dance,
Your voices are sharp and
Without my voice, my soul
Pours and drink the bitter in cup.
In my tears there are thorns,
Tingle my face and
There is no lap to calm.
Your hands are daggers
Your words hurt my lips.
Your faces fake and
My kisses become sour,
Bitter and sad
My lungs are lacking the air now,
Goodbye and au revoir
Copyright © Fatima Nusairat | Year Posted 2015
PREFACE TO A JAMAICA FAREWELL
When I’m gone
remember me in tamarind season
reflecting the bitter
sweet of life we shared
to the ambers
and blues of Caribbean skies
Listen to the thunder
and hear my soul
In the searching winds of time
look for me in the ebb and flow
of the tides:
Frothing the shores
with salted memories.
Copyright © millard lowe | Year Posted 2015
Even without access to my heart you break it
The pain is unbelievable
You are unbearable
Tears I didn't know I had pour from me until I'm drained
And then over and over again
Until I can barely recognize myself
Who I am gets lost in what I'm feeling
I wonder how can I be good in my soul
And be made to feel so low and left to feel it alone
It's the price for not loving you authentically
Because I was a victim who could only pretend to love her predator in hopes to make him docile and plan for escape
I don't miss you when you go
I don't think of you
I don't desire
I don't fancy you
But still I cling to the hope of redemption
I look in your eyes and hope to find a learned lesson
A cushion to soften all the hard blows you landed
A tenderness found in the time that's passed for the state of life you left me in
You abandoned me
Unforgivably abandoned our kids
Still you look at the mess you've made and step over it
I see you I see hatred
Don't ask me to give You one more chance
You only want me at your convenience
Memories are painful
You'll never be able or willing to give me what I want
You'll make promises you can never promise you'll keep
Your offer of love is too late
And I know you mean what you say
However I've un-boarded this train
Packed up all my pain
Every day I take a step toward a brighter day
Just as the sunshine warms my skin
You're here again
Picking at wounds that have barely healed
Stealing the sun and force me into an emotional whirlwind
I will not board this train again
I take another step in the other direction
Learn how to breath through the pain all over again
One day at a time
One day I'll see the sun shine on me again?
Copyright © Zen reed | Year Posted 2015
Poet: Ken Jordan
Poem: It's Over
Edited by: Sparkle Jordan
to be (?)
someone else -
together again (?)
Copyright © Ken Jordan | Year Posted 2014
Limb of my domain
To sing of crying pain
Clouds fill the sky
My heart does fly
Wisps of cool wind
The ground full of sin
Let me leave my limb
Floating on air prim.
3/23/2014 JOE POEWHIT
Copyright © joseph bejcek poewhit | Year Posted 2014
you were there the day I was born
you sewed my clothes and spanked me when I needed it
I wasn' t ready but you said it's ok your only a phone call away
so I moved away thinking it would be ok
then I got the call that you past away
I'm mad as he++
that much you can tell
I want to ask why you didn't say goodbye
was it because you didn't want me to cry
I'm going home but you will be gone
I think you went on
to make a home with a room just for me
you know it wouldn't be long before I come along
I didn't know I had brain cancer at the time you left me
I sit here and cry and hope it will not be long before I can come home
and join you again in heaven and sit by the fire then I know that is where I belong
Copyright © Patricia Bernard | Year Posted 2014
Here I am thinking again about how our life should of been
But it's to late cause you are gone the love we shared can't go on
Wishing we had more time before the clocks started to wined
Time has stopped since you went away I really wished you could of stayed
You have moved on far away but my love for you has never changed
When I die someday soon we will meet again pass the moon
Far away in an unclouded sky we will never say goodbye
As I look back on our life I realize time was not on our side.....
Copyright © Tiffany Flowers | Year Posted 2013
Goodbye Miss Heidi Only For Now…….8.3.14
Remembering that day I first brought you home the sun was out a warm July day, meowing never stopped on your first ride to your new home, waiting
Seeing you the first time a solitary cat of orange and gray you nuzzled the bars on the cage with your soft mews stole our hearts forever, beautiful green eyes shining.
Loving you from that very first day we knew you were the one for us special feelings felt for torty abounded in our hearts, our loneliness relieved.
At rest or at play Miss Heidi was our joy to behold with her climbing and jumping onto beds during laundry time was her favorite adventure , smiling
Whether sitting on warm jeans or her attempts to make the bed while in it was fun to watch and precious memories never to be forgotten, imbedded within us.
Basketball became her favorite pastime on TV either the squeaks of sneakers or just the speed the ball moved up and down the court her eyes fixed, a fan of the game was the furry girl.
15 years came and went in the blink of an eye it seems I remember many nights the two of watching sports on TV with her laying on my legs for hours at a time, never thought those days would ever end, life changes like it or not.
Many times like now she would sit on my lap waiting for me to get done with this silly computer and for us to get to things that really matter: more food and laying on the couch watching TV!
Arlene and Miss Heidi had a special bond too her furry daughter was never without love or food and water, love between them used to bring a tear to my eye, true love
The many comfortable places my wife made for Heidi to lay on including the enormous cat tower that she dearly loved and tore up! Showing how happy laying in it made her feel, over and over.
Whiskers blowin’ in the wind she came to love the fan upon her striking cheeks, a love we both shared with a smile
Our loves were made richer and fuller by having her as part of our family showing us unconditional love and how to love others than yourself, thank you furry daughter.
You taught me more than I ever taught you and helped make me a better man, loving caring man the powers of a tortoise shell who would have thought possible?
The many times mom covered you and I up when we fell asleep waiting for her to come home were and still are precious memories never will I forget you Baba……….
And times O found you sleeping in bed on your Cowboy blanky always brought a smile and tear of love to my face, we will never forget you our baby and first kitty/
Thanks for all the love you showed us over the years and all the happy times the three of us shared and your love for ham, my home made pork chops and tortilla chips.
You were a blessing from God and your spirit reigns on in our hearts, minds and souls we will see you again little baba and be reunited and I ‘m sure you will be hungry too!!!
Mommy and daddy miss you now and forever and are happy that you are not suffering or in pain ,you are with God now chasing squirrel’s and folding warm white towels waiting for us……
2014 © David J. Mitchell
Copyright © DAVID MITCHELL | Year Posted 2016
Months have passed
And I still don't understand
How your feelings could go away so fast.
I thought what we had was real.
I thought it could be forever,
Because my heart you did steal.
I still remember the glimmer in your eyes,
Your radiant smile
It was a love we could not hide.
All the PDA,
Oh I didn't know I had fallen
Until you had walked away,
Left me behind to cry.
Left alone to pick up the pieces,
Was it all just a lie?
I guess it's true that you were my first love,
And everything just went so well.
And your hand fit into mine just like a glove.
All I wanted was to steal your heart,
To have a relationship to make people envious,
But instead we had to part.
You were like a beautiful shiny pearl,
And it didn't matter what people said,
Because you were my girl.
Months have passed,
And I cannot forget the love we shared,
The love that just couldn't last.
Copyright © Cassidy Budd | Year Posted 2015
If out of darkness comes light, then my life must be one ginormous ray of sunshine right about now. Coming out of a 14-year classroom coma, I am now awake, yet I continue to slumber afraid to take the sleep mask off. Like a blanket being taken from my eyes, I can now see, yet using my eyes to peer through the darkness searching for that one ray of light produces pain much like the pain of stepping from a movie theater out into the bright parking lot blinded by sudden light. As cliché as that sounds, mine eyes have seen the coming of the light of my life, but will I pay for causing you all slow deaths? Through institutional darkness, one lone beam of light has emerged through the blanket of the forest with fauna so thick I can barely wield my machete to dent that dense thicket of poisonous shrubbery. Can I now see the darkness for the trees? Can it be? Am I really still alive? Did I have a hand at killing you all? After all these years crawling around in a black hole of the urban school setting, can I really be allowed to awaken to think for myself no longer perpetuating the status quo of public school bureaucracy? A single pinhole of a sun’s ray shines down on me through the crack in the eastward facing window, warming my crown that perches on the top of my head. I wear that crown like the queen who smiles below to her servants. Do I choose to serve the public any longer now that I realize my sentence is your sentence? Do I choose to report to the encompassing ebony of the sterile school for assorted abuse? Where there was a comforting death every 5:30 a.m., I arose to face my sentence in the sanitarium of the public school. Do I respect myself for exposing you to such darkness? No wonder you little people show no respect to your teachers. Should I expect respect from others after what I have done for the teaching machine? The system smothered me as I sank deeper into the abyss of the education system, yet I sucked the life out of you, too, children. Closing in around me, my soul was crushed by the force of stifling children from seeing the light. What is this freedom I now experience? Is this real? Am I dreaming? That alarm sounds no more, but that shrieking sound alerts me of danger as it still haunts me in my daytime hours where I pine for you all. There is danger in stumbling through darkness just as there is danger in revealing light. To be blinded no more, I feel my way to safety groping along a thick patch of freedom. From the pen on my resignation letter, I signed my career away to light and to life, though my guilt remains, as I am guilty of stamping out the light of children’s creativity for so long. There will be a price to pay, for this royalty reins no more. I no longer lord over small children in the classroom acting as a programmed machine of their minds. Wake up, children. Report to school like the good little soldiers you are to represent my kingdom of darkness, for it is time to lower the veil over your eyes. Sit in your assigned seat. Now, let me read you a bedtime story so that you pick up your number two pencils to write your tales following the prompt of being lost in the woods alone with your nightmares of light. I will guide you no more. You will serve me no more. Children, good night.
Copyright © Anita Dozier | Year Posted 2016
Fishing was a joy
A way to let time float by
Every weekend with his St. Croix in hand
He would take a leisurely walk to the lake
And as he did for over fifty years
It was always the act
Not the catch
That was his way of letting the world
Fade magically away
Still… these last several years
The lake had been quiet and still
And try as he did
All the fish seemed to be… gone
There were times as a boy
When bite by bite
The crowded lake, filled with fish
Would grab the hook
Until forced to stop by the weight of the load
He would lie on the cool green grass
And enjoy the summer sun
But those were the days of youth and fish
When the earth was still warmed by the sun
We’ve taken so much and given back less
Those days are long since gone
Copyright © CJ Krieger | Year Posted 2011
Call the lost cause, call out the Guard, because I'll say drowning is hard. You realize that you're all alone, to view pearly or fiery thrones. And when it hits, your mind's been blown. There's nothing you can do for me. I'm at the mercy of the sea. A kinder mistress than your she. Nothing's real! Nothing's fake! We don't realize the choices we make Come back to us in the oddest way. Such as where I am today. With what I found, could I stay there? And play pretend like there's no care? Of course I could, of course I would, if it meant I'd have you like I should. But there you go, I see you now, walking the beach holding your cow. But wait... the cow, not she, is me! So who am I supposed to be!? Am I the wife, or mistress here? All I feel is rising fear. Her wedding ring.. glowing so clear. The sea has given me her mercy. I have but yet one final plea. Give to her what you'd give to me. One of us should be happy. The surface breaks and here I go. I thrash, but halt. It's cold as snow. Now comes the part that we all know. The Guard has come, the day's been saved. But of those glimpses was I crazed? And where's the man who I so craved? Well, give him freedom, and give him much, but never lose your lady's touch. His love for you will grow to such Great amount's he'll never go, and leave you here to drown like so. Was it a dream? I'll never know. Ah look, it's Death In form Of crows...
Copyright © Erika Raiken | Year Posted 2012
Oh sweet bride to be
as the flowers bloom
you snuck to my room
in hopes of a lustful spoon
Groom anxiously awaits
as your father opens the front gates
No one will comprehend our fate
Face to face we engage
Stockings, undergarments and satin lace
on the floor they lay
We embrace and grind away
Copyright © Jonathan Moya | Year Posted 2017
I say goodbye a lot—not in an “I’ll see you later” or “until next time” sort of way—but in a “goodbye for good” and “never speak to you again” sort of way. I’ve always been all right with it, accepted it, and embraced it, even. You know, people come and go; they serve their purpose and even though sometimes it’s worth it, they go away. I’m guilty of it myself. Just leave. Get out. Go. Don’t stay. I’ve said goodbye so many times to so many people in so many ways, but you posed a problem that my brain, mind, soul, body can’t escape. I just want to be back inside your arms, your bed, your life, your heart, you. Instead, I ran off, 9 thousand miles away to wake up as you go to bed, to play in a giant sandbox. I do not want to stay here; June cannot come quickly enough. March, April, May—three more months of this living in your tomorrow, you in my yesterday. I miss you. I fear you. I long for you with intensity as deep, as overwhelming, as powerful and dominating as the sky’s infinity. I love you. I want you. I yearn for you in every single way; the tears I’ve bled for you are insurmountable. I wish for Home; I wish for the West. Even greater than my desperation for friends, family, familiar faces, familiar places, is my ache to have you near; if wishes were horses, and if horses had wings, I’d have one to take me there.
Copyright © Carly Bradshaw | Year Posted 2012
Let me molder on the surface of the Earth. Leave me on dirt with dross and peace. Let the four seasons sweep over my husk. In blood crush dust and petrified grease…. A feast for my insect and animal pals. This circle is my best and oldest friend. I was given to this promiscuous box and now— I return it back to its righteous end. So grow! — Oh, wild oaken ladle! Someday you may scoop the sludge from my deciduous knee caps. If I have to, I will change my approach to suit the drought. My sun worn bones will sprout curlycup gumweed. While the wind will carve all of the chondrocytes out. I will take pride in my rotting. Leave it for me— Leave it.
Copyright © Lxnnnie Rutledzh | Year Posted 2016