Consumed and confused,
Like a lost three year old whose mother has disappeared.
Life stolen, but so overwhelming that acknowledgement will not come
What will I do without you?
Hollowed out, so much of you infused into my being
Wrenched out unexpectedly and cruelly
Nothing left but a gaping hole
How will I live without you?
Surely I will bleed to death with this broken heart in my hands
Memories like daggers
Your scent all around me; in the closet, in your bed
How can I go on without you?
Living in a shadow, just a zombie
Once alive and fueled by your existence
Now just a shell without purpose
How could you vanish like this?
Reality edging in around the walls of denial I have created
I will leave everything exactly where it is
You will be coming home soon, I’m sure of it
How will I ever be the same again?
Your ghost follows me everywhere
We were together playing Candyland; sweet wet toddler kisses
How can I ever be the same again?
My hungry eyes search every detail of the photos I have of you
Trying to remember the exact color of your eyes
Feeling as though you are fading, swirling down a drain
What am I without you?
Are you cold below the heavy soil?
Your warmth is fading here,
I ache for your comforting presence, just one more time
Who will I become in this insanity?
I am so lost without you.
Copyright © Kelly McDonald | Year Posted 2006