Years Ago I Felt Hope

Years ago I felt hope. Sometimes I still think it still exists, but every moment a little less. I feel abandoned in my despair And pain and memories my bad decisions are difficult to repair all this pain and hate that I have inside my heart loneliness makes me colder. I break a little more every day keeping these emotions in my core. I find myself hiding behind this smile who shows a demon dressed in black I have thoughts of loneliness, which no person should possess. I camouflage it very well; It feels like I'm in hell. It hurts inside trying to put these demons aside. I want something better to not feel all this pain and I hate myself because I destroyed my life and hurt those I love most, I am a person that everything I touch destroys it. I know there are no excuses; There are things that make life tolerable like the memories of my son that I miss more and more as I want my grandmother to be here with me. I need life so much without her killing me slowly. I just can't find the emotion. I remember when dreams were imaginable now it seems that I am certainly fallible. I wish to meet soon. This feels like I'm trapped in a cocoon and I can't get out. My days are darker day by day and I've lost all hope, faith and any emotion that may exist in your heart. I would like to hatch, Not be so detached. I need to end this coldness before death leaves me without a soul
Copyright © | Year Posted 2019

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De Beaulieu Avatar
October 3, 2019 at 1:12 PM
Hello Ailene, i sense your distress and pain. You just have to do the best you can right now. Have a nice day my friend.
De Beaulieu Avatar
October 4, 2019 at 1:17 PM
Thank you Ailene I wish you the very best I am glad that I make you smile. //bless you always. Ailene. I am your friend Darlene.
De Beaulieu Avatar
October 3, 2019 at 4:55 PM
Hello Ailene Ramos, I am pleased to hear I make you smile. have a nice evening my friend.
Ramos  Avatar
October 3, 2019 at 1:41 PM
Thank you ms Darlene, you always been so thoughtful and a means a lot to me ,,, in that Type of way you put a smile on my face have a blessed day
Michael Avatar
October 3, 2019 at 11:13 AM
Well expressed...Time to light a fire...
Ramos  Avatar
October 3, 2019 at 1:40 PM
Hola sr Arturo thank you for taking your time to read my poetry a means a lot to me
Ramos  Avatar
October 3, 2019 at 9:55 AM
This is how I really fell empty and so emotional a even hurts to be alive
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