Home » Poems » Andrea Dietrich » Wood Envy

Wood Envy

Have I jealousy of my dear mate? I don’t think I have any, but wait! I sure wish I could pee in the wood near a tree like my husband does, standing up straight! For Line Gauthier's Funny Limerick Contest

Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem. Negative comments will result your account being banned.

Please Login to post a comment

Line Gauthier

Date: 4/15/2018 4:39:00 PM

Humm... sorry you didn't get a placement on this one - the double entente of the title should have been factored in. It was so funny, this was one of my first contests and I was taken aback when so many entries were crude... I actually had to go back to the definition of a limerick. It was a DUH moment!

Debbie Guzzi

Date: 12/29/2014 8:36:00 AM

silly Andie! Light & Love & Happy New Year

Jack Horne

Date: 12/28/2014 9:43:00 AM

LOL, I bet this will give Joe a chuckle too

Poet Destroyer A

Date: 12/26/2014 10:42:00 PM

double soup mail

Sandra Haight

Date: 12/24/2014 5:46:00 PM

Soooo funny, Andrea! I skipped this contest...couldn't think of anything to be jealous of with my hubby...This is a great one! one! Anyway, GL in the contest...it's a gem! Sandra

Paul Callus

Date: 12/21/2014 6:31:00 AM

Great one, Andrea!!! so very witty:) ... including the footnote! have a nice day! // paul

Daver Austin

Date: 12/20/2014 3:50:00 PM

Wonderful limerick, but tell your husband to watch out for ticks. They love the soft head. Love, daver

Roy Jerden

Date: 12/20/2014 7:13:00 AM

Haven't seen a limerick from you for a while, Andi! Good one! My wife has a similar opinion. Check out my latest limerick, too, if you have time. Cheers, Roy

Robert Johnson

Date: 12/19/2014 11:51:00 PM

This certainly gave me a thought. That a man still has need to squat. But while standing is great. An old corn cob can grate. When the tp never was brought. Hello Andrea. Loved your limy. Merry Christmas. Peace. :)

Connie Marcum Wong

Date: 12/18/2014 8:25:00 PM

I could never come up with something like this. I just can't write these. Good one Andrea!

Monterey Sirak

Date: 12/18/2014 1:44:00 PM

This one is FUNNY! So silly to be jealous of the ability to stand and pee. Besides it is an adventure to have to squat in the bushes, never know what may be in there.

Shadow Hamilton

Date: 12/18/2014 2:06:00 AM

lol so, so funny Andrea I agree it is annoying that we can not, but did you know if a man is not allowed to hold his member we can do it much father than them lol great homorous pen hugs 7

Cherl Dunn

Date: 12/17/2014 6:05:00 PM

Andrea, this is an interesting write lol, cheri

Nette Onclaud

Date: 12/17/2014 11:42:00 AM

this is outrageously true and funny, andie.. regarding my prism challenge, i posted the format on my contest page.. it has 6 lines with 3, 6, 9, 12, 15, 18 syls... i forgot it; it was 4am when i did it, ohhh. huggs

Terry O'Leary

Date: 12/17/2014 9:13:00 AM

Very funny... who wood've thought... ;-))

Maurice Yvonne

Date: 12/17/2014 5:29:00 AM

So in fact you wish you had a hose...be careful what you wish for...we are leaning towards the Crying Game with this one! How did you come up with...oops unintentional pun. Where did you pull this one out of...oops unintentional pun. It must of been hard...ah never mind. Very funny! Did I like it? Does Pinnochio have wooden balls? Great write!

Andrea Dietrich
Date: 12/17/2014 8:57:00 AM

I loved that movie the Crying Game, but be assured I have no desire of having a weenie, except when I am in need of bladder relief in the woods! hahaha

Demetrios Trifiatis

Date: 12/17/2014 4:40:00 AM

Hilarious, dear Andrea!

Frederic Parker

Date: 12/16/2014 6:50:00 PM

I got nothing to say, except better check which way the wind is blowing

Jennifer Walker

Date: 12/16/2014 4:42:00 PM

That is funny and yet true. I was a bit envious of that very thing today while burning leaves in front. I have to walk all the way to the house, take my boots off and go in to the bathroom, my husband off behind a tree.

David Meade

Date: 12/16/2014 2:59:00 PM

Awesome -- I bet he could do it sitting down, laying down, kneeling down even upside down!! Father of the Swift Water men!!

Casarah Nance

Date: 12/16/2014 1:02:00 PM

LOL, I think it is brilliant!

Jan Allison

Date: 12/16/2014 11:11:00 AM

ha ha ha wonderful - good luck! hugs Jan xxx

Brenda Meier-Hans

Date: 12/16/2014 10:04:00 AM

Hahahaha. Thanks for the laugh today Andrea. Oh how oft I've had those longings on my journey through life.

Rajat Kanti Chakrabarty

Date: 12/16/2014 9:51:00 AM

PeeBuddy HiHiHi Andrea. Love Excellent.Hugs! rajat

Darlene Gifford

Date: 12/16/2014 9:45:00 AM

I say, let it be "pee." I know there are many other words we can use, but Oprah uses it, and if it's good enough for her, why not for Wee. (I couldn't help from playing on the "we" there.) Good luck with your contest.

Brenda Meier-Hans
Date: 12/16/2014 10:05:00 AM

I like wee.