Woe Is Me To the Dvlc Driving Vehicle Licence Centre
Woe is me to the DLV by Gypsy View previous topic View next topic Go down
Location : Marton, New Zealand
Oh DVLC you have upset me, you are so unkind
You’ve committed the ultimate sin; I need to unwind
You really have upset me with your letter received to-day
How could you be so cruel to do things in this way?
I learned to drive at seventeen in an Austin 7 painted dark green
The choke would flood the carburettor, rain water cleaned the windscreen
The cranking handle yanked your shoulder and took ages to turn
Black oil leaked out, the embarrassment, the whole town could smell the burn.
The car would stall time and again; you hopped along like a kangaroo
Then you had to get out of the darned thing, keeping the ignition on
Running to the back of the car you would push it down the street
When the engine purred you ran like hell to get back in the driver’s seat
There were no nice heaters in winter to keep me warm
Neither air con in summer to cool me from sun’s harm
Steamed up windows were the order of the day
As for frosty mornings, no de-icer, elbow grease was the only way.
Banana yellow indicators at the side (when they worked) clicked left or right
If they did not work window wound down, you should have seen the sight
Hand signals were the order of the day; no rude finger signs were used
Power steering was in the future; road rage not invented for folk to be abused
On hot days the plastic seats would burn your thighs and bum
No tight seat belts to hold in your boobs and tum
Then the driving test was the punishment we faced
My driving examiner, a Mr Tipple I recall, was so straight laced.
At last I passed the test times three, so proud
I had to shout the news to a passing crowd
The world my oyster I now was free
Only soon to become a possession of the DVLC
At thirty four pence a Gallon Petrol was expensive !!
But garage services were thorough and extensive
Windscreens were washed each time for free
Oil and tyre pressure checks done for no fee,
I scraped along to pay Car tax, insurance and MOT
Lots of money to find over the years for poor little old me
But now DVLC have gone too far by half, admonishment is a must
Their crime? they just dared to inform me I’ll be SEVENTY this AUGUST!!!!!
BARBARA BREWIN (C) 2015
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