Gary Radice Poet Narrative

Notes About The Poem

---

Revised and republished: 25th April 2022

This poem was placed 1st in the "CRAP SHOOT #2" contest sponsored by John Lawless (Judged 13th December 2022)

This poem was placed 1st in the "Best Formal Experiment" category and 1st in the "Best Narrative Poem" category of The National Poetry Month Fesival Contest sponsored by Daniel Henry Rogers (Judged 4th May 2026)

A Soldier's Story told in 3 Parts

---

Wilderness

Pt I: The Pilgrims
1991

he’d pick ‘his’ path up as it fell
between the dunes toward the wood
and as the trees knew him so well
they’d all bow down right where he stood
and every day with time to pass
he’d walk and find his secret seat
surrounded by the marram grass
divorced from life’s hard grind and heat
and there he’d sit and watch the sky
feeling the calm he craved back then
 - the only place that saw him cry
before he walked his path again.


2021
 
they picked the path up as it fell
between the dunes toward the wood
despite their health and age as well
they struggled on as best they could 
now thirty years had come to pass 
walking the route to see the seat
surrounded by the marram grass
where they sat silent in the heat
then just before they headed back
with one last look their will was done
they touched the seat's small weathered plaque:
"in memory of our loving son".


Pt II: Gethsemane
1991

the flood that drowned his will no less
were the tears that he had cried
while trekking through his wilderness
and the storm that raged inside
yet when the sky lit up right there
it ‘spoke’ to him at length
 - the rainbow brought a purer air
and the clouds some inner strength
then in the cooling midday heat
feeling calmer than before
he stood up from his secret seat
to walk his path once more.


Pt III: Evensong
2021

a photograph that takes pride of place

"we tried to help and always prayed"


in uniform with a pre-war face

"he turned to friends but felt betrayed"


some polaroids of a young child’s smile

"the three of us when we held hands"


all neatly kept in a grey box file

"he loved to play along those sands"


a secret seat and a place of peace

"discharged, divorced - and yet still strong"


sunsets, psalms and pain release

"this parents' path is hard and long."

♡Like0

Share Poem

---

Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem. Negative comments will result your account being banned.

Please Login to post a comment

Rob Carmack April 30, 2026 at 4:15 PM Gary - Like it is often with my contests, good to see in the list of Daniel's finalists. Gary Radice May 2, 2026 at 2:02 PM Rob thanks so much. I’ve been away for a couple of days so coming back and finding out that my poem has done well in Daniel’s contest has been a lovely surprise. I’m going to set some time aside over the next couple of days and have a good read of others’ work - your winning work too of course. Congratulations. Cheers - Gary

Bj Legros Kelley May 15, 2025 at 7:55 PM Gary, this touches me deeply, as did your message to me on soupmail. I'm truly grateful for your compassion, I feel understood, for you know the effect of this devastation. The poems here, so heartfelt and deep, as the pain at the loss of loved ones who took their own precious lives. Your compassion is like a balm to my heart, though there will be no healing in this world. Thank you for bravely ministering to those families through healthcare, and for these poems Gary. God bless you. ~BJ Gary Radice May 16, 2025 at 9:51 AM Thank you Bj. I've sent you another Soupmail. Cheers - Gary

Maria Williams October 19, 2024 at 8:52 PM The story you have described dear Gary, is abundantly saturated with emotions, inner turmoil and dejection. I'm so glad you invited me to read it. Thank you. It could be written into a drama script - I'm sure there are other incidents to stitch into the production. Hugs Maria Gary Radice October 20, 2024 at 10:33 PM I could probably write several long running drama serials about my time working in the NHS Maria - and they would probably only cover my nurse training days. :) I'm grateful for your comments, thanks so much. Cheers - Gary

Lin Lane October 12, 2024 at 12:53 AM I am so glad I asked for the last two parts. The word, 'powerful' doesn't come close to the emotions I felt when reading all three parts together. Yes, more goose flesh. Having read some of the earlier comments, I see where the foundation for your poem was poured... through the sorrow and pain, emotional and physical of your patients. You relived a portion of it from the men you helped. How sad that they fought to keep us free and in so doing they were captured in their private hell. Excellent! soup mail for you Gary Radice October 13, 2024 at 10:40 PM Thanks Lin. Tbh my plan was initially to republish the first part for a short period of time and then pull it. A stopgap between new stuff to keep me in the PS loop but it went and got awarded POTD. I do prefer this, the original as it tells the bigger picture. Poetry eh? Thanks again. Cheers - Gary

thriveni c mysore October 10, 2024 at 6:30 AM I was led to this poem by your recent post 'Pilgrimage' I followed the link. Your explanation below as reply to poet J W made me understand the poem more. Powerful write dear poet. Thanks for posting 'Pilgrimage' else I would have missed this awesome heartfelt poem. Be Blessed dear poet. Gary Radice October 10, 2024 at 7:17 AM Thank you thriveni for your valued comments. I think the three parts together offer more context to the overall story. The poem was based on several cases during my time as a mental health nurse / community liaison nurse working as part of a multi disciplinary brain injury team. Thanks again. Cheers - Gary

Ann Peck December 17, 2022 at 4:22 PM Gary, I'm so glad to learn you are a nurse for mental health patients. They need someone like you, who truly cares. A good friend committed suicide as did my grandson-by-marriage. My husband of 40 years was bipolar, though never suicidal, and I had a mentally ill stepmother growing up. It is a sad condition. ~ I loved your poems. Gary Radice December 18, 2022 at 2:56 AM Thank you Ann. The poem was a bit of a catharsis for myself - the death of any patient under your care as a nurse can be heartbreaking. It's only when working as a Mental Health nurse you get to see the true problems people face, the systems that they are up against and the ignorance and lack of knowledge the general public have about mental illness. Surprising really as it is estimated 1 in 4 of us will have mental health issues (of various levels) sometime in our lives. Thanks again Ann and a very merry Christmas to you and your family. Cheers - Gary

John Watt December 15, 2022 at 1:47 PM Gary, your words of support were so meaningful to me when I wrote of my cousin's suicide and his parents grappling with the aftermath... I'm glad I can return the favor. Your history as a mental health nurse and your sensitivity as a poet puts you in a very unique position to write such a powerful piece, both for the awareness it raises of suicide and its gravitational pull on the soul, and for the empathy you exhibit towards its victims. The nature imagery you employ is so poignant: flood, wilderness, storm, rainbow. I also value the inclusion of the secret seat where the tormented soul could go to pour out his tears without being judged. You are a wonderful artist, and this is a masterpiece and well worthy of its first-place finish. Cheers, John Gary Radice December 16, 2022 at 7:22 AM (1 / 3) Thanks John. Your wonderful comments mean so much. They truly do. Thank you! The ex-soldier in the poem is based upon several people from my nursing days. PTSD is often associated with combat exposure as is the case here. Depression is usually associated with loss; ie loss of marriage, loss of social standing, loss of job, loss of friends..loss of coping skills etc. In addition, feelings of anger, frustration, ‘survivor’s guilt’ and helplessness (all of which I’ve referred to as the storm in the wilderness) tend to be common. One particular patient I knew turned to religion for support once his friends deserted him. I'm not sure they had, they just didn't understand what he was going through. Gary Radice December 16, 2022 at 7:22 AM (2 / 3) The references to religion in the poem reflect the soldier's own beliefs: the Cloud + light are a symbol of the Holy Spirit's presence and the rainbow refers to his belief of God's existence. From my own nursing experience religion provided so much support for many patients but some turned to it in anger. As a side, one of the most difficult things to determine as a mental health nurse is to decide whether any sudden happiness or spurt of energy levels in a very severely depressed patient is due to an improved mental health state or whether a patient has made plans to self harm / commit suicide and carry through with their plans. Sadly this happens and was the case with the ex soldier in the poem. Gary Radice December 16, 2022 at 7:21 AM (3/3) Anniversaries of sad / tragic events are usually times of increased risk of self harm and low mood but even armed with all the knowledge risk assessments can't always reflect the true person or their mindset. Unfortunately no person or institution could save the discharged soldier in the poem. An anniversary of a loved one's death can be a very difficult time. The parents speaking in Part IIII (in italics) are based on several parents I spoke with after the suicide of family members: Their guilt, 'Could we have done more?' Their memories of their son in happier times: (The polaroid photographs) The fact that their son returned to a safe place he enjoyed as a child (the beach in this case). Was this returning to the beach a cry for help that 'hid in plain sight'? The parents' burden of loss and the upset that each day brings rarely gets any easier ... Not one of my easiest poems and one of my least read but one I'm particularly proud of. I'm glad you like it. Cheers - Gary

David Bose December 14, 2022 at 5:04 AM Well-deserved first place, Gary. The rhythm your words assume make this so easy to read, which I think is more difficult when we take on "deep" themes like this. A very powerful work. Thanks for it. Dave Gary Radice December 15, 2022 at 12:19 AM Hi David. Thanks so much for your lovely comments. I've seen first hand the effects of PTSD on people and sadly the tragic consequences such can bring. Its the families and loved ones who are left feeling the hurt and guilt (the ex-soldier's parents in this case) .Thanks again. Much appreciated. Cheers - Gary

John Lawless December 13, 2022 at 12:23 PM Gary, I have read this multiple times and each time been drawn deeper into the depth of its meanings. Thank you for participating in the contest Gary Radice December 13, 2022 at 2:18 PM My pleasure John and thank you for running the contest. I was blown away by my podium place. Cheers - Gary

Timothy Ray April 18, 2022 at 4:10 PM a very powerful narrative Gary....as a Patriot Guard rider i have had to be with families that have suffered this loss...funerals such as these are hard on everyone....great narrative, on point...great job Gary Radice April 19, 2022 at 6:45 AM Thanks Timothy and by the way that's an excellent and highly valued job you do. (I just Googled PGR) During my career as a mental health nurse, suicide prevention was always the number one issue. It was all about the support but at times even with this, it still wasn't enough for some. I saw first hand the upset and suffering of loved ones. Thanks for your visit. Read you soon.. Cheers - Gary

Sam Kauffman April 13, 2022 at 10:07 AM Amazing does not begin to describe this heart wrenching, masterfully crafted, emotionally evocative write Gary. Suicide leaves a scar that never heals. Thank you for sharing this poem. Happy Easter to you. Gary Radice April 14, 2022 at 3:39 AM Thanks Sam for your valued comments. Happy Easter to you and your family too! The poem was originally published in 3 separate parts at PS but I've now published them together as one poem as I think in this form it gives a greater context to the overall story. Thanks again. Cheers - Gary