Why If Its Not

Why, do we call it Something it’s not If we’re going to name things Let’s give it, some thought If it’s called a chilli Then why is it so hot And I can say this A guinea pig, is not A prairie dog He only digs holes But this dog belongs With rodents and moles If you eat an elder berry You won’t get to retire But a taste for them You must acquire If I strike a ball And this gets me pissed In real life, I hit it But in baseball, I missed That horned toad Isn’t a wizard Not even a frog It’s just a lizard A pencil with lead That’s just a myth It’s really graphite That we write with A simple door mouse Is really neither It’s just a squirrel Taking a breather It’s not a firefly Lighting the dark It’s only a horny beetle That has the spark And who gives us silk Not that silkworm It’s really caterpillars That wiggle and squirm Bears have no pouch But Koala bears do It’s a marsupial I thought you knew To some this may not Be a big deal But wasn’t Achilles Really a heel That majestic bald eagle His head is not bare And that speedy jackrabbit Is really a hare A Turkish bath Invented by a Roman And catgut intestines From sheep abdomen A shooting star That isn’t right It’s always been A meteorite A peanut a nut You would presume Nope, not a chance It’s a legume A Douglas fir Is only a pine And that funny bone It’s not, by design Cucumbers and tomatoes This is a hoot They are not veggies They’re really a fruit A duck bill is not A duck’s paper money And bees didn’t make My little honey Hamburgers are made With beef and not pork And how come those hot dogs At strangers don’t bark Sometimes you get A really dumb waiter But not in a restaurant It’s an elevator Eye tooth is a dog’s tooth But not in his eye This kind of name Just makes me cry A killdeer is not roadkill That’s just absurd It really is A wading bird Duck weed is a water lily Dog wood is a bush An ear wig is an insect And your ass is a tush Shortbread is a cookie And a jumping bean is a seed And things we misname Only tend to mislead BOEMS by JA 134