Why I Cry
I was crying tonight
I thought I had survived the pain
I know I was lying to myself
Holding back the tears
Pretending that life had moved on
That I had moved on
As the the night drifted to dawn
I found so much missing
Then I pictured him
The image was so clear
My mind wandered back to the nights we shared
I felt his hand upon my skin
I saw the reflection of the moon in his eyes
I felt the happiness that lived in each moment
With him I felt whole
My life complete
Without him
Emptiness engulfs me
Sadness overwhelms me
I am lonely
Not for my lover
Not for companionship
Not for the man
For my best friend
I am lost
I look around and realize
This is not where I belong
This is not where I should be
This is where I stay
I ask myself why I stay
And though I can make a list of reasons
They are all excuses
Words that mask the fear
The fear of failure
Fear of more heartbreak
I know how disappointed in me he would be
And that is why I cry
Copyright © 2009 Lena “Lolita” Townsend
Copyright © Lena Townsend | Year Posted 2009
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