Where Am I?

Hey, I'm a NYC guy... Where am I? What's these tall green things all over? How they get in the way of another begoda... And, this air, smells so funny, Where's the soot, the grime,?? It's even sunny! And where's the crime? Haven't had a house break-in yet, I'm starting to pine... Where they hidin' all the buses? The subway I can't find... I'm startin' to think... I'm losin' m mind.. And these huge bumps in the ground.. Are they ground mumps? And the puddles so big... I'm amazed what they do.. To cross those puddles, They use a canoe! Maybe I'm just confused, With vision that's bad... But this is the worst nightmare, I've ever had... My God, ya' gotta drive to find a MacDonald's... And that makes me whine... Ain't these yokels 'bout's here, Know how to fine dine? And the people are weird, They must be quite sick, They're walkin' around smiling, Like they found a crack stick... Think I'm gona go back home, To NYC, Where I understand things, And I can be me.