When the Rain Comes

When the rain comes in blunt despair
With swords of Thor's thunderous wield
The clouds drape darkness everywhere
As light surrendered, as hope kneeled

Where desolated gloom revealed
A drab landscape that once was fair
Limbs barren in deserted fields
When the rain comes in blunt despair

Drowning sunsets in silver flares
Tomorrow's rainbows lie concealed
In mazes of charcoal nightmares
With swords of Thor's thunderous wield

This is where all your heroes yield
To stars laden in disrepair
Where souls sink, murky and congealed
The clouds drape darkness everywhere

When suns are lost and moons are rare
The mornings cut apart and peeled
The sky is strangely unaware
As light surrendered, as hope kneeled

When shelter remains unrevealed
And the horizon appears bare
Allow me to become your shield
Against the snare of sharpened air
When the rain comes

3/11/23

Copyright © | Year Posted 2023



Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem. Negative comments will result your account being banned.

Please Login to post a comment

Date: 11/7/2023 3:17:00 AM
Michelle ….This is such an impressive piece with a beautiful flow of descriptive lines. You really nailed this form in style. Best, SuZ
Login to Reply
Date: 3/25/2023 1:47:00 PM
Wow! Michelle, You penned such a good poem for the contest. It flows well and the imagery is amazing. You made it look easy, I know firsthand that's it not. Best wishes in the contest:-) Alexis
Login to Reply
Faulkner Avatar
Michelle Faulkner
Date: 4/6/2023 10:38:00 AM
Thank you very much Alexis
Date: 3/25/2023 3:42:00 AM
wow one of your best Michelle. You are skillful at this form, "This is where all your heroes yield" amazing words like magic they appear to make me feel. Gl in the contest, :)
Login to Reply
Faulkner Avatar
Michelle Faulkner
Date: 3/25/2023 7:41:00 AM
I am very flattered and honored, thank you again for your encouraging words~
Date: 3/24/2023 3:46:00 PM
This is so lovely, Michelle, particularly "as light surrendered, as hope kneeled. Also "when suns are lost and moons are rare." This seemed like a really difficult form when I read the contest. You make it seem effortless. Best of luck!
Login to Reply
Faulkner Avatar
Michelle Faulkner
Date: 3/24/2023 8:42:00 PM
Thank you again, Ann, you had commented on this one before but am always glad for seconds :)
Date: 3/21/2023 10:09:00 AM
This is fantastic Michelle, your repeating lines are flawless, looks like a win to me, great poem !
Login to Reply
Faulkner Avatar
Michelle Faulkner
Date: 3/22/2023 10:36:00 AM
I am so flattered, thank you for your comment-
Date: 3/18/2023 7:07:00 AM
This is such a fascinating poetry form. I'm amazed by it frankly, the way you carried the rhyme scheme like that. Extremely gifted writer here.
Login to Reply
Faulkner Avatar
Michelle Faulkner
Date: 3/19/2023 5:09:00 PM
Thank you very much, Nancy, I appreciate your kind words~
Date: 3/17/2023 9:45:00 PM
I admire the craft work here, the repeating lines woven into the narrative and all those endings with only two rhymes, wow. But you are especially grand at creating original phrasing, "in blunt despair", "as hope kneeled", "the snare of sharpened air", plus the three Laura mentioned. Also the allusion to Thor. Really fabulous word painting, my friend. A Fav ~ John
Login to Reply
Faulkner Avatar
Michelle Faulkner
Date: 3/19/2023 5:08:00 PM
Yes this form can be a challenge but also rewarding, (thank goodness for rhymezone!) Actually the line with Thor was the trickeist to get right, thank you as always for your supportive comments, and also the fave :)
Date: 3/17/2023 12:44:00 PM
You set the mood and imagery so masterfully in your poetic phrases, Michelle…”drowning sunsets in silver flames” “stars laden in disrepair” “mornings cut apart and peeled”! I am in awe of your creativity! This one deserves top placement in the contest! :)
Login to Reply
Faulkner Avatar
Michelle Faulkner
Date: 3/19/2023 5:06:00 PM
I am flattered, thank you so much, Laura
Date: 3/16/2023 7:10:00 PM
A brilliant poem, Michelle, flows so smoothly, "as light surrendered, as hope kneeled" - awesome imagery and personification:)
Login to Reply
Faulkner Avatar
Michelle Faulkner
Date: 3/17/2023 7:33:00 AM
Thank you kindly, Jo, appeciate it
Date: 3/11/2023 6:39:00 PM
A fine poem, Michelle... Adding my two cents: When the rain comes, let me be indoors, please... Have a blessed Sunday and a Happy Week! ~ Gershon
Login to Reply
Faulkner Avatar
Michelle Faulkner
Date: 3/11/2023 9:44:00 PM
Yes that's the best place to be, thanks so much gw
Date: 3/11/2023 11:58:00 AM
Splendidly done in this hard to execute form, Michelle. Great imagery dwelling in emotions. No doubt a winner.
Login to Reply
Faulkner Avatar
Michelle Faulkner
Date: 3/11/2023 1:42:00 PM
I appreciate your kind words, thank you Vijay
Date: 3/11/2023 10:41:00 AM
exceptional poetry...
Login to Reply
Faulkner Avatar
Michelle Faulkner
Date: 3/11/2023 1:41:00 PM
Thank you very much, Pashang
Date: 3/11/2023 8:39:00 AM
Michelle, Your poem is incredibly beautiful! So strong and metaphorical. You chose such a difficult form (at least to me) and wrote it perfectly. Good luck in contest (I bet it wins) :)
Login to Reply
Faulkner Avatar
Michelle Faulkner
Date: 3/11/2023 8:47:00 AM
Thank you so much, Ann, this one took some time to come together, I am glad you liked it~
Get a Premium Membership
Get more exposure for your poetry and more features with a Premium Membership.
Book: Radiant Verses: A Journey Through Inspiring Poetry

Member Area

My Admin
Profile and Settings
Edit My Poems
Edit My Quotes
Edit My Short Stories
Edit My Articles
My Comments Inboxes
My Comments Outboxes
Soup Mail
Poetry Contests
Contest Results/Status
Followers
Poems of Poets I Follow
Friend Builder

Soup Social

Poetry Forum
New/Upcoming Features
The Wall
Soup Facebook Page
Who is Online
Link to Us

Member Poems

Poems - Top 100 New
Poems - Top 100 All-Time
Poems - Best
Poems - by Topic
Poems - New (All)
Poems - New (PM)
Poems - New by Poet
Poems - Read
Poems - Unread

Member Poets

Poets - Best New
Poets - New
Poets - Top 100 Most Poems
Poets - Top 100 Most Poems Recent
Poets - Top 100 Community
Poets - Top 100 Contest

Famous Poems

Famous Poems - African American
Famous Poems - Best
Famous Poems - Classical
Famous Poems - English
Famous Poems - Haiku
Famous Poems - Love
Famous Poems - Short
Famous Poems - Top 100

Famous Poets

Famous Poets - Living
Famous Poets - Most Popular
Famous Poets - Top 100
Famous Poets - Best
Famous Poets - Women
Famous Poets - African American
Famous Poets - Beat
Famous Poets - Cinquain
Famous Poets - Classical
Famous Poets - English
Famous Poets - Haiku
Famous Poets - Hindi
Famous Poets - Jewish
Famous Poets - Love
Famous Poets - Metaphysical
Famous Poets - Modern
Famous Poets - Punjabi
Famous Poets - Romantic
Famous Poets - Spanish
Famous Poets - Suicidal
Famous Poets - Urdu
Famous Poets - War

Poetry Resources

Anagrams
Bible
Book Store
Character Counter
Cliché Finder
Poetry Clichés
Common Words
Copyright Information
Grammar
Grammar Checker
Homonym
Homophones
How to Write a Poem
Lyrics
Love Poem Generator
New Poetic Forms
Plagiarism Checker
Poetics
Poetry Art
Publishing
Random Word Generator
Spell Checker
Store
What is Good Poetry?
Word Counter