When Suicide Smiles
If I had a gun I would have already pulled the trigger
No silencer because I've been silent my whole life
I wish suicide was as easy as a snap or whistling because I'm too sad to live
My mask has a smile
You start out pretending, then you get good at acting
So, it becomes hard to distinguish your happiness and bad thoughts
Soon you start to imagine how happy you would be if you didn't wake up in the morning
This is not happily ever after, it's the tragedy
People used to tell me I wasn't black enough
Well, what if I cover my skin in ink
I bet when I walk by you think
Twice
Trying to fight this vice
Is like starring into the sun at times
And sometimes life is too hard to think of a rhyme
At times I get distracted but I'm learning to stay in my lane
Learning how to drive down the highway of success and positivity
Visualizing myself in my dream car
Speeding
Hands gripping
Then I realize I need to slow down before I crash into depression
I almost gave up in order to learn to help myself
Because even when I had the answers, I would still close my eyes and lock my mind
Afraid to be vulnerable
My mind likes to play games but I'm not one who likes to roll the dice
p.s. switch lanes but never the destination...
Copyright © Roses Roses | Year Posted 2022
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