When?
When will the tears stop flowing
and the pain stop growing.
Wanting this poor heart to find some peace
even if it is in pieces.
broken battered and bruised
I am not sure how much it can take.
Why do I put myself through this day after day.
walking a tightrope between two worlds.
Feeling the eternal tug of death at my heels.
Not wanting to give in
but fighting it gets harder and harder each day.
Will I have the strength to not give in?
To keep that promise I made so long ago.
My body heart and mind ache for release.
Anything to stop this onslaught of darkness.
Creeping ever closer and threatening to overcome.
Why I cry. knowing there will be no answer or worse
an answer I cannot accept.
Shouting towards the heavens I gasp for breath
weary to the bone.
Weary of living
Weary of trying
Weary of feeling.
Want to be numb.
Want to close down my heart for good.
At least this way I will not allow anyone to hurt me anymore.
Besides is that not the destiny of She who walks alone?
Forever taking her own path.
Going her own way and leaving a trail of tattered souls and hearts in her wake.
Not sure if this is the end or beginning of a new journey.
Only time will tell.
Copyright © Julia Brown Badr | Year Posted 2009
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