What the Bartender Heard
Please pass me a double with 100-proof zing
No, I’ve no money, but I’ll pay with this ring
Yes, it’s a diamond yet it lost its luster
I found him with her; my mind did fluster
So I tossed the harlot out of our house
And called him a thoughtless cheating louse
I’ll need more booze if you want to hear more
There are some trespasses you can’t ignore
Shot him in the kneecap, crippled that lout
So now there’ll be no more running about
Hey, that ring’s two carats, worth a refill
I’ll take another shot of this swill
I tossed him the cell to call 9-1-1
My goose is cooked; the law will soon come
Fill one more to go ‘fore I hit the road
And thanks for allowing me to reload
*Entry for Natalie’s “Confessions to a Bartender” contest
Copyright © Carolyn Devonshire | Year Posted 2011
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