Petra Mallett Poet Free verse

What If?

Years later, your words still resound
   - vibrating in my ears:

“If I can't have the real thing, 
  I guess I'll have to find someone like you" 
Repeating over and over….

But you had the real thing - me - 
       and you threw me away for her.

But what if?

What if you had never strayed and
       I had never found out?
what if our love was never 
       callously tossed aside to doubt?

Would I still lie awake, night after night? 

Would I still wonder if "someone like you” 
     could actually have been me?
Would I still wonder if our love ever had
     a real chance to be?

Would your words still echo? (teasing my heart)
And would these feelings I still have for you 
     keep lingering? 
(…tearing me apart…)

If “someone like you” was really me
    would I still be haunted by your memory?

Because my conviction of “what if”
Makes me wish I could find “someone like you”

….since I don't have the real thing…..

…since I no longer have you.

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