Weak

The sadness is creeping It is taking over my whole being The insecurity, the self loathing The constant longing to be somewhere else Someone else The endless days The endless nights The endless nightmare That is my life How I wish to be happy How I wish to be carefree How I wish for days gone by To be the person I once was I am stuck in this never ending circle It goes around and around I can't break through I am not strong enough now I have been worn and torn And am no longer complete I am broken inside Like a shattered windscreen Just holding together by a thin laminate It is like being stuck in a well Looking up at the world going by I put on a front so that nobody knows I don't want to see the pity in their eyes I don't want then to know that I am weak So I keep on keeping on Smiling along at them talking Though not really taking them in My eyes glaze over as they tell me their stories Though all I think about is my dark place The place which is now my home The place which I dread I will live forever This is my bed and it is here that I lie Like a stone at the bottom of a lake Heavy and lifeless Muddy and worn and being buried more each day