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Watan - Homeland

I never saw my home land,
when I see it on TV,
a strange ache is inside me,
I do not understand.

I was born in (censored),
a country far away,
from where I currently stay.
That's where my parents fled.

How can I long for Egypt,
a country in turmoil,
with only foreign soil,
while my heart was ripped

by that very man from there,
who stole me and abused,
and tortured, sold and used;
who made me say 'grand-père'.

I never saw my home land.
I need to know my roots.
one day I will set foot,
and I will hold the hand

of my family who missed me,
so many years, and yearned,
until they finally learned
I was still alive, and free.

Until that day it's exile.
Trying hard to survive,
write, heal, study, thrive,
wanting to see the Nile.

I am hiding where I'm staying,
sometimes it drives me mad.
My past makes me so sad,
I almost give up, aching.

My watan, you won't save me,
I just want to understand
why this foreign land
sounds like healing, being free.

***


October 01, 2017
Copyright © Darren White

Copyright © Darren White | Year Posted 2017

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Freddie Robinson Jr. Date: 10/10/2017 10:32:00 AM Beautiful, inner journey to the soul poetry, Darren! I can relate very much w/your pain of self-discovery. Being the son of slaves, my heritage was ripped from me as well. Your poetic expressions of humility and tear-sought enlightenment is superb. A masterpiece of a poem. Going in the instant fave file for sure. Love and peace always, bro. Login to Reply Darren White Date: 10/10/2017 11:52:00 PM Love and peace to you too :) Yeah, I already thought you would be able to relate... I am the son of refugees. They tried to find political asylum in a handful of European countries and were turned down every time. I was born in a 'temporary' camp for refugees, but later we moved to a regular house. It's a strange thing, this root-finding feeling.

Shubham Pal Chowdhury Date: 10/9/2017 2:39:00 PM Nice Login to Reply Darren White Date: 10/9/2017 2:42:00 PM Thanks

Indiana Shaw Date: 10/5/2017 3:09:00 PM I cannot even image what it is like not being able to return to one's homeland - I can only image that if you made it back the tears in your eyes - God speed Darren . . . Login to Reply Darren White Date: 10/9/2017 2:41:00 PM Indiana, thank you so very much :)

Janis Medders Tobechi Date: 10/4/2017 9:35:00 PM A reader can feel the longing for home in this poem. Remember that sometimes life comes in circles and cycles and we will be led back to where we began. Blessings of peace be unto you. Login to Reply Darren White Date: 10/5/2017 1:16:00 AM Janis, thank you :) And yes, you are right.

Eileen Manassian Date: 10/2/2017 8:55:00 PM Beautiful piece, my dear...There is so much to ponder. I've also not been able to go back to where I was born. It's been 40 years now...The ache is still there. There is much beauty in your homeland, dear. The circumstances that took you away seem horrific. Heal, dear one. Login to Reply Darren White Date: 10/4/2017 12:44:00 AM Yes, it still hurts doesn't it, Eileen? Thank you!

Tim Smith Date: 10/1/2017 6:17:00 PM It is nice to get a feel for your heritage... lovely poem my friend Login to Reply Darren White Date: 10/2/2017 12:18:00 AM yes, it certainly is. But Sami tells me about it. She was born there and still remembers quite a few things :)

Agnes Krampe Date: 10/1/2017 4:39:00 PM I wish you that you heal and get to see your homeland, Darren. Strong, brave poem. Login to Reply Darren White Date: 10/2/2017 12:17:00 AM Thank you Agnes, I hope so too :)

Patricia Cresswell Date: 10/1/2017 12:37:00 PM I believe we are tied to our natal land by an unbreakable umbilicus. We were fed by it, drank its water, breathed its air as we awoke from birth it is the first atmosphere we experienced. The longing to return is natural. Your poem has strengthened my belief that it is in our DNA. Excellent write. Login to Reply Darren White Date: 10/1/2017 12:40:00 PM Thanks Patricia, I start to believe that you are right :)

Sara Ella Date: 10/1/2017 11:28:00 AM To go back to the place we have history-it is a natural yearning. Very well written, with the past background and the present <3<3<3 Login to Reply Darren White Date: 10/1/2017 12:40:00 PM Thanks so much Sara, and yes, that is it.

Charlie Smith Date: 10/1/2017 10:49:00 AM "watan" you won't save me" interesting choice of words. I'm unsure, without capitalizing watan, what that means. I thought of it as a political movement in Egypt. that not withstanding, great write and you took me into a life so different as to make me think how I might react, good work Darren.. Login to Reply Darren White Date: 10/1/2017 12:39:00 PM Thanks Charlie. The subject line says Watan - homeland. I hoped that would make it clear :)

Arthur Vaso Date: 10/1/2017 9:40:00 AM So beautiful Darren, you have expressed this story so well in this poem! Login to Reply Darren White Date: 10/1/2017 12:38:00 PM Thank you so much my friend :)