Wasted Time

The time that I have wasted is my biggest regret, spent in these places I will never forget. Just sitting and thinking of the things I have done, the crying,the laughing,the hurt and the fun. Now it's just me and my hard driven guilt, behind a wall of emptiness I allowed to be built. I'm trapped in my body,just wanting to run, back to my youth with it's laughter and fun. But the chase is over and there's no place to hide, everything is gone,including my pride. With reality suddenly right in my face, I am scared and alone and stuck in this place. Now memories of the past flash through my head, and the pain is obvious by the tears that I shed. I ask myself why and where I went wrong, I guess I was weak when I should have been strong. Living for the days and the wings I had grown, my feelings were lost,afraid to be shown. As I look at my past it's so easy to see, the fear that I had,afraid to be me. I pretended to be rugged so fast and so cool, when actually I was lost like a blinded old fool. I'm getting to old for this tiresome game, of acting real hard with no sense of shame. It's time that I change and get on with my life, fulfilling my dreams to be a better mother and wife. COLLEEN MARIE BONO