Warm air balloon

Poet's Notes

A young woman with great potential isn’t as naturally gifted  as those considered “elite”, sees her life fall into a predictable routine leading to a sense of diminished hope for a bright future.  

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Alone, surrounded by seventeen million humans who call New York home
In a rut, depressed, searching in pain and in vain for hope

A crisp fall day, I venture north to play
The Adirondack valley, mountains borne from bursting glacial fountains
I drive alone to see the big balloons, clearing my mind as each mile clicks behind

A festival, forcing myself among people, children virtually tattooed with a brazen sense of hope
Children burst with joy as balloons begin to rise, they seem so wise
I watch a young girl, perhaps only three, she scans the balloon field so carefree
My big city worries left miles behind, self-discovery and inspiration I'm here to find

Forlorn, scanning rainbow colors and lollipop grins among the scenes
A light breeze, crisp fall air, clad in pink sweater and jeans
My Louboutin’s at home, I blend in easily
Letting my mind drift, confronting myself bravely

I'm young but school lingers in my distant past
Do I have what it takes to succeed and to last
I'm not as gifted as the best yet with plausible potential

I try I fail
I cant seem to get the elevation to improve my station
I veer off course, unable to remain focused
I'm human - a warm air balloon - am I too destined for a hopeless meager flight?

Just as a tear streams down my cheek
I elevate my face skyward, catching a breeze to behold a bright rainbow of twenty balloons
Red, yellow, orange and green - cotton candy puffs dangling,  banging against the baby blue sky
A kaleidoscope of color, different shades of hope

The young girl, propped in her father's arms, pointing skyward admiring the candy store colors 
Her blonde curls bob in the breeze
I see one she chooses to ignore, drawn to it from deep within my core
The one balloon, flying below the others, no one cares to see or to be
It goes unnoticed, it won't win
This lonely balloon's flight mimics my own plight
An antagonizing allegory screaming my true story

Alone among the crowded field of onlookers, hands drop to my sides
Jaw slackens, eyes glaze, mind drifts, I become this balloon as if a character in a cherished childhood cartoon
I watch the others pass me by, they soar high, fast, bright
I fall behind, not good enough yet choosing not to despair
Or to myself, be both blatantly and subtly unfair
I avert finding fault, cursing my fate or my failure to elevate

Hovering over truth's razor edge 
I entrust myself a new life pledge
Stay in the race, soon I'll keep pace, eventually the one they'll chase

My belly burns with fire of desire
Yearning to achieve, not for wealth, not for fame
My ambition is for those I love
The gift I pursue is to be my best but not compared to the rest
My best future self, my vision for the one I want to become

"Look Daddy" cries the little girl, pointing skyward to the drifting balloon
I blink, shudder, return to the moment
I follow the little girls finger pointing skyward and I see it too
What the pilot does differently is a mystery but the lowly balloon rapidly elevates

Joy flashes across the little girls face, experiencing the balloons success
She doesn't care how hard it was or how close the crew came to giving up hope
The little girl smiled, reminiscent of me as a child, a moment mutually transcendent

I make way to my car, returning to the city of seventeen million balloons
Top down, cool air whipping through my hair
Shades on, concealing moist eyes
Vibrations from the road rearrange me emotionally
My trust in hope rising from toes to nose with a sudden warm rush gently settling in my heart
I promise myself never to forget the plight and successful flight of that one
Warm air balloon

Copyright © | Year Posted 2017

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