War of the Soul

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Written on December 31, 2023

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Pride jumped into a frightening battle, Too selfish, this war was never settled, Almost so dark, felt like stars would rattle. Inside, pride’s heart and spirit were mettled. Pride rejected kindness and charity, She listened to the dark world of conceit, While I avoided her sincerity, Knowing her dark vengeance was bittersweet. Refusing to heed soul’s humility, Pride, she’d surely bleed the murkiest grief, Battling in a war called futility, Pride will get you nowhere, that’s my belief!

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Constance La France

Date: 1/12/2024 1:32:00 PM

Gina, wonderfully penned, I love your choice of themes and for this example of the form required in your contest, a FAV, blessings, Constance

Andrea Dietrich

Date: 1/10/2024 3:28:00 PM

Hi Gina. This is such a great example of personification. I like your contest and your model for us here

Reason A. Poteet

Date: 1/9/2024 4:59:00 AM

Right on, Regina. Pride was Lucifer the angel's problem and we all know he got kicked out of heaven. You have written it well. Bittersweet is the operative word - pride honors oneself rather than our Creator.

Sam Kauffman

Date: 1/8/2024 11:18:00 AM

Truly, pride blinds and cripples us, Gina! And I love your metaphor about the battle between pride and humility. Amen! "Pride will get you nowhere!" Blessings of health and happiness to you in 2024, dear friend!

Sara Etgen-Baker

Date: 12/31/2023 4:21:00 PM

Pride and ego are such powerful forces that work hand in hand. You've touched on that power, the power that can erode a person's life and soul. Well said!

Silent One

Date: 12/31/2023 3:43:00 AM

Your poem beautifully captures the internal struggle of pride, portraying it as a fierce and unrelenting force engaged in a battle that remains unresolved. The vivid language paints a picture of darkness and conflict, as pride clashes with humility and rejects the virtues of kindness and charity.

Jeanette Swan

Date: 12/31/2023 3:30:00 AM

I have not read many poems about pride. I think you are right, that pride listens to conceit and self, and is often in a futile battle. These words stand out to me for making imagery: battle, dark, war, conceit, bleed, grief. It is a challenging mirror to look into.