James West Poet Free verse

Waking Nightmares

I can’t tell if my nightmares
Are the ones I’m living 
While I’m awake
At least I think I know
That when I’m sleeping
I have the chance to wake

But during my waking hours
The world I’m in
just seems to be so empty
There’s only broken people here
Who are only really pretending
to be friendly

They look at me with
Only selfish 
or dishonorable intentions 
But I’m not as stupid as they think 
But their bulls**t is
Worthless to even mention
They look at me with a clever mind
But I see through their disguises 
I’ve seen it all 
And felt it all 
There’s nothing left in this place 
That surprises

It’s all the same 
In every place
My feet have ever wandered
"Is this all there is?"
Is the most frequent thought I ponder

The world has taken everything from me
Why the hell am I still here...
I’ve known of death
Betrayal and separation 
Incarceration 
Anxiety and fear

And the whole time
The biggest lie
Was that someone could maybe love me
But I found out when 
Push comes to shove
The ones that love me do the shoving

So with a heart of regret
And memories I try to forget
The best I gave you 
Is the best you’ll get
So remember me 
Or don’t.
It’s all the same
That’s true
So in all honesty..
F**k You.
I’m out.

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