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Villains Protest Re-Writes

So let me get this straight
(if I can use that word
in a totally non-offensive way)

Jack and Jill now get bottled water
Delivered.

Little Bo Peep
Keeps her sheep on leash
And cleans up after them.

The Three Billy Goats Gruff
And the troll
Play Bridge

The Ugly Duckling
Can no longer identify
As a Swan

Hansel and Gretel
Take the “witch”
To the spa
For a steam and sauna

Little Miss Muffet
Moved her tuffet
To a “spider free” zone

The “Big Bad Wolf”
Is now with “IT”
Trouble shooting
Grandma’s laptop
After installing 5G
Internet access
For the Three Little Pigs.

And the Three bears
Take Goldilocks
To IKEA.

John G. Lawless
©3/29/2023

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Panagiota Romios

Date: 4/4/2023 9:53:00 AM

I laughed out loud at these, John. These are creative stunners. Children’s books are being rewritten. Like Winnie the Poo, even Willie Wonka and the chocolate factory. The Woke monster even destroyed Disney world…. Wait till they get to ee Cummings, Bets are the Kama Sutra won’t be touched. Pangie xo

Gershon Wolf

Date: 3/29/2023 7:29:00 PM

This Big Bad Wolf had his head shrunk. Now he's a raising pigs in brick houses.

Brenda Chiri

Date: 3/29/2023 7:05:00 PM

Lmao! I simply love this piece…well done!

Paula Goldsmith

Date: 3/29/2023 8:04:00 AM

What can I say/type. I am laughing tooooo hard. A fav. Have a fun/blessed day writing away...................

Daniel Turner

Date: 3/29/2023 6:02:00 AM

Big bad wolf is my favorite of these John. All good stuff. Humor works for me. have a super day.

Paul Willason

Date: 3/29/2023 5:44:00 AM

Excellent John, a chilling commentary housed in humour. Too true I'm afraid. Latest is they are now editing Agatha Christie to remove what is deemed offensive.