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View From Basement Flat

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View from Basement Flat Window, by Suzette Richards - image generated.


 

It was the sound that first drew me 
to the low street-facing window.
I cleared a small spot in the grime
and was rewarded by ankles.
Clickity-clack, clickity-clack.

Joie de vivre discernible
in the rhythm of her hurried pace, 
that's only broken when she skipped 
the crack in the concrete pavement. 
Clickity-clack, clickity-clack.

The fashionable red high heels
heralded slim, well-formed ankles 
which could only lead to good legs 
powering the mesmerising
clickity-clack, clickity-clack.

Perhaps a secretary or 
working at reception nearby.
Her stride was confident, assured, 
as far as the high heels allowed.
Clickity-clack, clickity-clack.

One could set one's watch by her and 
it appeared someone did just that.
Jeans-clad and brown brogues appeared
from the opposite direction.
Clickity-clack … clickity-clack …

Not breaking her determined stride
he had to fall in with her pace.
Old acquaintances or new friends? 
There was a slight skip in her walk.
Clickity-click, clickity-click.

Glistening in the morning sun
the gold ankle bracelet shone new.
Brogues in close proximity
to her, shortened his longer strides.
Clickity-clack, clickity-clack.

The summer heat did not entice
her to swap high heels for sandals.
He wore story socks with sandals - 
a marked difference in dress code.
Clickity-clack, clickity-clack.

As cool autumn approached, so did 
the distance widens between them - 
the former rapport's now broken.
The staccato now hesitant: 
Clickity…clack. Clickity…clack.

When the first flurries of snow fell, 
her lone high heels sought purchase on
the thin black ice on the pavement.
The bracelet's not in evidence.
Click-clack, click-clack …

Copyright © | Year Posted 2023




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Date: 8/11/2023 9:20:00 AM
EDIT: 'her lone high heels *seek* purchase on' ~ change to "sought" for tense consistency. Also, you might consider changing the sixth' paragraph refrain to reflect the 'slight skip in her walk' ~ "click clickity clack" suggesting a cryptic clue as to the quality of this stranger.
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Robert Warlov
Date: 9/12/2023 4:27:00 AM
~
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Suzette Richards
Date: 8/12/2023 10:52:00 PM
Many thanks Robert. I appreciate your feedback.
Date: 8/9/2023 4:16:00 AM
Great observation, Suzette:) dramatic indeed:)
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Suzette Richards
Date: 8/9/2023 7:35:00 PM
Thanks, Jo :)
Date: 8/8/2023 1:16:00 PM
wow, great writing, dramatic indeed. You are very talented. I loved the repetition of the sound of the heels!
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Suzette Richards
Date: 8/8/2023 10:06:00 PM
Thank you, Andrea, for the high praise. :)
Date: 8/8/2023 9:42:00 AM
Ooooh loved how you wrote an entire story with just passing high heels!! Enjoyed:)
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Suzette Richards
Date: 8/8/2023 9:52:00 AM
Hi, nice hearing from you. Susan. Thanks:)

Book: Reflection on the Important Things