Untitled
There is no greater sorrow then to recall in the most miserable times, when you were happiest.
Only our pillows know the great amount of emotions we hide from this world.
All the pain, hurt and sadness that I hold inside my heart and soul.
In those moments when a man cries and his voice gets caught and he cant speak but only make an absolutely raw and visceral sound between a cry and a scream for help. Right there in that moment that is the closest you will get to hearing the sound of a heart break.
Soon that man will stop shedding tears, he will grow very cold and cut ties and create distance from everyone. So no one has to see him, deal with him and he won't be a burden to anyone he cares about.
He will start to find ways to dull and kill the pain away an escape from the pain of this reality. He will stop shaving and showering taking care of himself in anyway. He will get into a funk and he will start to think that it's him, he not enough he not handsome enough he isn't fun
He will start sleeping later and later or he just won't sleep at all.
He will carry all the weight of the hurt regardless if it was his fault or not.
He will look back at his life and pick apart and dissect every relationship and he will never trust anyone with his whole heart ever again.
Especially himself.
He will lose what made him, him and he will never trust or be kind to himself ever again.
His life is just hour to hour day by day, killing time just trying to make it to the next day will become his only goal.
He will be kind as he can and he will do all he has to but he will never truly be him again.
So hope it was worth breaking him. Hope it was worth destroying his look on love and breaking his heart into more then fine dust.
He can't go on he can't keep doing this he is dying inside and feels like he is invisible to all around him. He counts the days until he can say goodbye to this cruel mean heartless world.
Having a kind loving big heart and being raised to be the good guy by our mothers!
He will get so sick and tired of being the bigger person. Tired of hurting so no one else has to!
It sucks to feel so empty but still give all he can. He want to curl up and close his eyes and never move.
The pain is so unbearable and he just want it to stop!!!!!
He wants to be left to rott in his own misery.
Wallow in his darkness.
The only place he feels safe and protected
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