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Unrequited Ah L'Nass

No broken we, but transformed, remade, in semblance. Though rough of eye, no longer fresh still on and on we dance. Wingless wonders, shushing we's, cajoled, with discontent searching for the higher arch, the longer toss, not spent. Breathe on with breath as sweet as melon, as round and ripe and fluid. Farm the earth, the skies, the stars Just so, you'll be pursued.

Copyright © | Year Posted 2010




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Date: 10/24/2010 12:40:00 PM
Congrats Debbie on your featured poem this week on the Soup.. a really great piece to share with us all my friend with luv.. pupil..in luv..
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Date: 10/24/2010 12:16:00 PM
Congrats on your tribute being featured. Vince
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Date: 10/21/2010 7:59:00 AM
D.G., hello & Congratulations! On your awesome & well done poem being featured this week: ) have a nice one,..p.d.
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Date: 10/19/2010 9:58:00 AM
Congratulations on your well deserved poetry being featured this week. Love, Carol
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Date: 10/19/2010 8:20:00 AM
The dance of life? I hope I caught the drift. Congrats on the selection. Dave
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Date: 10/18/2010 8:51:00 AM
I too, have often wondered and prayed that our friend is doing okay, is staying safe and well. His poetry reflects the soul of such a kind, wise, and caring man....just as this poem reflects your own caring heart. :)
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Date: 10/18/2010 8:15:00 AM
ACW by L'nass Shango /To you again after being spent by time to sit/ Fresh in disshrivelled memory, we reflect life/ In the compass of our dreams, and feel the lit/ Faith in tomorrow gave us. We chose our strife/ And can do nothing today to reverse/ The sag and deluge of Adam's curse/ But now must wait to see if we gave/ What is required another's dream to pave
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Date: 10/18/2010 8:14:00 AM
This poem was written FOR L'Nass Shango we have not heard from him since July. I pray all is well!
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Date: 10/18/2010 7:07:00 AM
DEAR Light and LOVE,Congratulations on this Exquisite POEM being Featured this Week YOUR Talent shines LOVE ALWAYS,YOUR Liege...HG
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Date: 2/27/2010 5:36:00 PM
Is this the one you meant? No, Deb. It's not completely iambic and for its style and content, I think it is labeled correctly as free verse. By the way, I still can't get to your haiku.So sorry, I drove to SL to see an awesome movie and now I am inspired to write prose about the final scene for Frank's contest . I spent 5 hours on my silly zoo poem, which I am gonna finally post now. LUv andrea ps hubby might come home to not one thing DONE today.
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Date: 2/27/2010 8:38:00 AM
i like this. not broken, but changed. a lot of deep words you used to create such a pure poem here. -Always&Forever Lynette
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Date: 2/26/2010 2:06:00 PM
Deb, this flows really well, for free verse it is unusually rhythmical. I think you "do" have the beat in you. Did you realize this was mostly iambic, and I bet you were not even intending that! Luv, Andrea
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Date: 2/25/2010 6:13:00 AM
Matt is correct I had wanted breeth on with breath..the first image indrawn air the second to denote a type of scent or fragence coming from the speaking out loud Babylon will say the word through your speakers so you can hear it! I highly recommend this program. I'm changing the word order now! Thanks Matt!
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Date: 2/25/2010 12:23:00 AM
No I doubt you'll lose your touch Debbie with FV.Rgds Brian & thanks for your welcome comments
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Date: 2/24/2010 8:37:00 PM
Dear Light and LOVE, Deborah, Every time I read YOUR wonderful POETRY, my mind races I collaspes into YOUR WORDS as I walk through this Garden of YOUR Mind I feel the Essence of this SUPERB POETRY I, like Carrie and Linda-Marie must Quote " No broken we, but transformed, remade, in semblance" to me that is Majestic, Alluring to the Eyes and Soul THANK-YOU for YOUR Gracious Comments I Heed YOUR WISDOM YOUR Liege ALWAYS...HG
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Date: 2/24/2010 8:35:00 PM
Is is "breathe on with breath?" or that way you out it? Phoenetically I'm assuming it as "breeth on with breth"... senseless technincalities aside...the is great! the strong, singular carefully chosen words, strong and compact it reads...
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Date: 2/24/2010 5:57:00 PM
Every line a winner..a change in friendship with dear L'nass. Though rough of eye, no longer fresh....wow!! Can't decide which line says it best....this transformed relationship so beautifully described ever changing....!
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Date: 2/24/2010 3:34:00 PM
Depth ..lots of depth to your words... "wingless wonders" .. shooshing we's cajoled" ..priceless... luv.. Linda-Marie
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