Jan Allison Poet Verse

Notes About The Poem

 

I recently posted a poem called 'Dressed by Nature' Arthur Vaso then challenged me to write one with this title

Undressed By Nature - For Arthur Vaso

Trapped for so long in walls that cocooned her
She struggles to break free
All she desires is escape from the darkness of her prison
And the walls that bind her
To feel the sun on her face, the cool breeze on her body
She pushes and pushes with all her might …
Eventually she sees a pinprick of daylight 
She struggles and struggles, fighting with all her strength
Finally emerging into the world
Fluid pumps around her body 
She twists and turns and her wings start to unfurl 
Hanging upside-down she remains motionless for several hours
Slowly, sensuously, she reveals her beautiful body
I gasp at her breathtaking beauty – she is simply stunning
There before my very eyes – a beautiful butterfly

13th April 2015

♡Like0

Share Poem

---

Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem. Negative comments will result your account being banned.

Please Login to post a comment

1 2

Noman Hamza July 18, 2015 at 11:51 PM 'simply stunning' can also describe your poem.It is as balanced,as brilliant ,light and small as a butterfly.i like the phrase 'a pinprick of daylight'.Noman Jan Allison July 19, 2015 at 4:07 AM oh thanks you for such a delightful comment Norman:-) hugs jan xx

William Gray May 9, 2015 at 3:36 AM Hi Jan, A beautiful piece of writing, superb images adding great feelings and emotion!. The picture as always compliments this great poem!. Loved this Jan.xx Jan Allison July 19, 2015 at 4:04 AM I'm so sorry I missed this comment before - many thanks for dropping by:-) hugs Jan xx

Teddy Kimathi April 30, 2015 at 4:55 AM Hi Jan. A very beautifully, well-penned piece it is!! *^_^* Jan Allison April 30, 2015 at 5:00 AM Thanks Teddy - Arthur challenged me to write a poem with this title after I posted a poem called dress by nature - not quite sure it was what he was expecting lol but I was really pleased with the final result and the lovely comments:-) hugs jan xx

Wilfred Aniagyei April 17, 2015 at 6:48 AM Nicely penned....very encouraging.... I wonder if you were challenged more lol Jan Allison April 17, 2015 at 6:51 AM Oh Arthur has challenged me on several occasions - I am so glad he liked what i came up with for this one! :-) Hugs Jan xx

Darlene Gifford April 16, 2015 at 8:38 PM Labor is long. But the end result is worth the struggle as she emerges and shares her beauty with the world. Well written, Jan. Jan Allison April 16, 2015 at 8:43 PM Thanks so much Darlene:-) Hugs Jan xx

Matt Forshay April 14, 2015 at 10:07 PM This is a beautiful and deceptive tale of one of natures great transformations. At least I wasn't thinking about a butterfly until it emerged at the very end. Jan Allison April 15, 2015 at 3:29 AM Thanks Matt I like to write with a twist at the end of my poems if I can:-) Hugs jan xx

James Fraser April 14, 2015 at 2:57 PM Beautifully constructed poetry Jan for each line takes the reader on a wonderful journey with the delightful ending of a butterfly. Love it, to my fav's, hugs//James xx Jan Allison April 14, 2015 at 3:02 PM Oh thank you so much for your continued support James I do appreciate you taking the time to comment:-) Hugs Jan xx

Richard Lamoureux April 14, 2015 at 8:18 AM You rose to the challange, I believe this to be one of your best Jan.7! Jan Allison April 14, 2015 at 11:22 AM Thanks Richard - I relate this write to my poetry journey over the last 14 months - wow I am flying high and spreading my wings like a butterfly:-) hugs Jan xx

Olive Eloisa Guillermo - Fraser April 14, 2015 at 7:09 AM WOW! I love how you did this JAn.. :) the ending is a good twist.. the other lines is simply the skin of the caterpillar.. very clever.. :)!hugsxx!~olive eloisa Jan Allison April 14, 2015 at 11:21 AM Thanks Olive I love to write with a twist - I can only thank Arthur for the title:-) Hugs Jan xx

Dr. Upma A. Sharma April 14, 2015 at 2:16 AM Wonderful expressions Jan! What a lovely tribute ! Jan Allison April 14, 2015 at 6:43 AM Thanks Dr Sharma:-) Hugs Jan xx

Thomas Martin April 13, 2015 at 6:46 PM Love the subject matter, Beautifully expressed!. Jan Allison April 14, 2015 at 1:07 AM Thanks Thomas:-) Hugs jan xx

Andrea Dietrich April 13, 2015 at 6:33 PM haha, at first I thought it was a baby in th e womb and my second guess was BAT, and then I guessed butterfly! Jan Allison April 14, 2015 at 1:07 AM I do like to have a twist at the end - guess you could say I'm a bit twisted lol:-) Hugs jan xx

Tim Smith April 13, 2015 at 5:28 PM I loved the twist Jan...you had me...lovely hugs Tim Jan Allison April 14, 2015 at 1:06 AM Thanks Tim - you know me well my friend:-) Hugs Jan xx

Eve Roper April 13, 2015 at 3:44 PM WOW!!!! :) will you had me stumped here I thought it was a woman, Duh,,, a butterfly. I love it, wonderful write, you out did yourself. a 7 and a fav. Blessings eve Jan Allison April 13, 2015 at 3:50 PM Thanks Eve the image i posted was deliberately misleading... but I do like to write poems with a twist if I can:-) Hugs jan x

Anne-Lise Andresen April 13, 2015 at 1:51 PM - A fantastic writing, you are amazing dear friend Jan !!!!! - Topp rating !!! - hugs // Anne-Lise :) Jan Allison April 13, 2015 at 1:53 PM Aww thanks Anne Lise - Arthur challenged me to write a poem with this title and I am really pleased with the comments I've received:-) Hugs Jan xx

Lotte Lo April 13, 2015 at 12:49 PM Birth is a fascinating process and covered in your words it is magical! Thanks a lot :) Jan Allison April 13, 2015 at 12:58 PM Thanks for that delightful comment Lotte:-) Hugs Jan xx

Maurice Yvonne April 13, 2015 at 11:52 AM Honestly the line "she pushes and pushes with all her might" I thought we were talking constipation and hemorrhoids. Luckily if was a stunning poem about a butterfly! Stunning! Jan Allison April 13, 2015 at 11:58 AM LOL you do make me smile my friend:-) love and hugs Jan xx

Emile Pinet April 13, 2015 at 11:33 AM A heart warming story that carries a message of hope and rebirth within nature as a caterpillar's transformed into a butterfly. Emile. #7 Jan Allison April 13, 2015 at 11:45 AM Thanks for the lovely comment Emile I am delighted by the comments I have received for the challenge set down by Arthur:-) Hugs Jan xx

Joseph May April 13, 2015 at 11:06 AM Beautiful write Jan...best wishes Jan Allison April 13, 2015 at 11:20 AM Thanks Joseph - just a fun write as a result of a challenge set down by Arthur:-) Hugs Jan xx

Arthur Vaso April 13, 2015 at 10:31 AM Wow, simply beautiful!!!! Loved this!! Jan Allison April 13, 2015 at 10:33 AM Oh Arthur thank you - I did hope you were not disappointed with my interpretation of the title:-) hugs jan xx

Sharon Gulley April 13, 2015 at 8:54 AM Wow ! Jan, I love this exceptional write here and I love butterflies so this write made my day to read with it's excellent imagery, and sweetness of words as well as thought put into this one. Awesome write and a 7 for me, off to my favs....Sharon G. Hugs : ) Jan Allison April 13, 2015 at 9:02 AM Thanks Sharon thanks so much for your lovely comment - reading about how the butterfly HAS to struggle to get out of the cocoon or its wings won't unfold makes you appreciate the intricacies of our natural world :-) Hugs Jan xx

Anna Hopper April 13, 2015 at 8:53 AM This is amazing! I adore your descriptive words. Simply exquisite! A 7 from me! Jan Allison April 13, 2015 at 8:59 AM Thanks so much for the lovely comment Anna:-) Hugs Jan xx

Sara Kendrick April 13, 2015 at 8:51 AM Enjoyed reading your work..You brought the butterfly's metamorphis alive..Thanks for stopping by..Sara..I have finished my work Fiery Horse.. Jan Allison April 13, 2015 at 8:58 AM Thanks Sara I was a tale reading about a child trying to help a butterfly emerge from a cocoon and the butterfly was unable to fly - they need the struggle to get out of the cocoon to get the fluid moving to get their wings to unfold - isn't nature amazing:-) Hugs jan xx

Casarah Nance April 13, 2015 at 7:49 AM AWESOME!! Wow, you are a woman of many great styles and forms, you can write anything and make it work! you rock! Jan Allison April 13, 2015 at 7:56 AM I had to give Arthur's challenge a go - think he will be a bit disappointed with the ending lol:-) Hugs

Grace Mutindi April 13, 2015 at 7:45 AM This is beautiful Jan...love it! Jan Allison April 13, 2015 at 7:56 AM Thanks Grace:-) Hugs jan xx

1 2