'Twas The Night Before Christmas

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'Twas the night before Christmas at my house when I heard a noise I knew wasn't a mouse. And as the kids dreamed fast asleep in bed, through their window, I saw a flash of red. I thought raccoons were causing this uproar, I know what they're like; I've heard them before. Tipping over garbage cans, they're a pest; wanting to see for myself, I got dressed. No one was stirring, so I went to see what made enough noise to awaken me. Grabbing a flashlight, I headed outside where I slipped, landing square on my backside. Let me tell you, I wasn't in a good mood: and that fall didn't improve my attitude. On the roof, I saw reindeer and a sled, for it wasn't raccoons, but Santa instead. And Rudolph's scarlet nose was all aglow, causing a red reflection on the snow. Santa winked and then disappeared from sight: believe me, I'll never forget that night. My wife wouldn't listen to a word I said, worried that I probably hit my head. But when I was getting up from my fall, I swear I heard, "Merry Christmas to all."

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