Tom and Terry - At Milton Creek

[My recent poem ‘The Dimly Lit House’ received a Comment from Charles Messina that it could be a Tom and Jerry episode… what can I say? Something went ‘Ping!’] * Milton Creek’s mayor has acquired a cat The mayor’s name is Tom and he’s called his cat that While Deputy Terry at home in his house Has given his name to his resident mouse He stuck with that name for a very short spell But soon modified Terry’s name to El Tel It wasn’t too long before cat and mouse met To become the town’s most mortal enemies yet They’d chase hell for leather as one might have thought But El Tel was quick and he rarely got caught That evening was lit by a very full moon And Tom ambushed El Tel outside the saloon Under the swing doors and kicking up dust Two seconds later the hinges were bust El Tel, the mouse had sped in from the street And come to a halt with a screeching of feet Hot on his tail Tom did not stop at all At least not until he crashed into a wall To the rear of the bar (it was there for safe keeping) Milton’s old shotgun had blocked El Tel’s creeping He hid in the barrel so wouldn’t get caught A great mouse idea, at least that’s what he thought There had been two pistols but shotguns are bigger So El Tel was safe… until Tom pulled the trigger Kaboom! Should have made a mouse-splat on the wall But the wide open window meant no splat at all El Tel spread his arms and began flapping them And then he shot through the doors of the Big M David, the ranger, said, “Gimme a break.” As El Tel crashed down on his well seasoned steak But El Tel was wily and strong for a mouse And made his escape with that large porterhouse With Tom at his heels, El Tel squealed his appeals “Meet me in ten by the old stagecoach wheels, This steak is so massive, there’s plenty to share, I’ll share it with you if you just meet me there.” El Tel ran straight to that planned rendezvous A half empty jar meant he knew what to do He wiped himself down with the dark sticky paste And wolfed down the steak, not a scrap did he waste And when Tom arrived El Tel said, “You’re too late, That’s the best steak that I’ve eaten to date.” Tom grabbed El Tel, “I shall eat you instead, What a shame I haven’t got any bread.” El Tel then found himself on Tom-cat’s tongue And gazed at the teeth he was sitting among Tom simply grinned as he shut his mouth tight Then spat El Tel out and cried, “Garrrhhhhh… MARMITE!” El Tel just laughed and said, “You can’t eat me, Your name might be Tom, but you'll never be he. You’ve got all the brains of an old sewer rat Which sounds about right for a scrawny old cat.” Tom snarled, “I’m gonna take one for the town.” With one gulp he swallowed that sneaky mouse down Inside Tom’s tummy El Tel found it funny His mouse disposition was suddenly sunny At least in Tom’s tummy there’s no need to feed it Though strangely El Tel hadn’t known he would need it So El Tel was able to relax and give Tom-cat a direct dose of laxative At first there was silence and El Tel was worried But deep down he knew that some things can’t be hurried And then with a rumble, a gurgle, a flutter Tom rubbed his belly and started to stutter “Does Milton Creek have a cat litter tray? I don’t often bother but need one today?” Then El Tel shot out like a cork from a bottle Hit the saloon like a steam train - full throttle The smell of cat poop really made Jenna glower And later she trod on a mouse in her shower So El Tel was flattened and slurped down the drain But no cartoon creature can ever feel pain Tom scooped him out where the drains met the creek And El Tel just grinned and said, “Same time next week?”