Three Course Meal

You've heard the story of Goldilocks And the bears that chased her away But now it's time to tell the truth 'Cause it didn't really happen that way Goldilocks weighed four hundred pounds She'd eat anything in sight And It didn't matter what it was She still had to have one bite Now the whole town knew of her appetite So they locked their food in storage And that just left those poor little bears Who was just trying to cool their porridge Now she could smell food a mile away For she had an amazing snout But still she waited to make certain Those bears had ventured out She didn't just break one of those chairs She actually broke all three Remember, she weighed four hundred pounds, And was as fat as she could be? She wandered into the bedroom And broke each one of their beds So she curled up on the floor to sleep With three pillows under her head While she slept, those bears came home And they were as hungry as could be Did I mention she broke the remote control To the bear's big screen tv? Anyway, the bears had finally had it That's all that they could take In their rage they didn't notice That goldilocks was now awake So they trapped her in the corner And were poised for the attack But goldilocks was still hungry And was looking for a snack Needless to say she ate those bears I know this story seems crude But I'm just trying to warn you To make sure you hide your food Based on Goldilocks and the Three Bears