thoughts of a teenager

what's that? who's this? what am i doing? why am i here? i have so many questions about, well, everything. i'm expected to know so much but i feel like i don't know anything. the brain of a highschooler is an interesting one. i can list fact after fact about chemical bonds, the civil war, why the sky is blue... but i couldn't tell you my favorite food. my favorite movie. what i really want to do with my life. i don't know myself. sometimes i feel guilty about having opinions. because, well, i don't really know. maybe its because people never listen. maybe its because if a man said it, he would be worshipped. praised. appreciated. because no matter how loud i yell. they would never listen to me. and if i ask why? they say i never talk. but they are the ones who don't know how to listen. i do everything in my power to please others. i build them up, brick by brick, while the walls of my mind begin to crumble because i am taking from my foundation. because instead of eating my food, i wonder how many calories are in it. how much sugar there is. artificial ingredients. and they wonder how i stay so skinny. i don't have the heart to tell them i'm starving. for food, for attention, to be heard, to be seen, to be wanted, to be chosen, to be loved. i still have so many questions. but i know one thing for sure. the strongest soldiers are not the ones who are given the toughest battles. the toughest battles find the ones who they know can't fight for long.