The word: Suicide

When I was six I didn’t know what the word suicide meant I don’t even remember hearing it I played with dolls and swinged in the park I laughed loudly and had fun When I was eight I found out what suicide meant And the word scared me I played games on my phone and went to school I laughed with my friends and studied When I was ten I knew what suicide meant It was still an uncomfortable topic I watched films and read books I fought with my friends and family When I was twelve I realized suicide no longer scared me The word started growing closer to me I stayed home and felt empty I had no friends and didn’t talk to my family When I was fourteen The word suicide was on my mind all the time It began to feel like answer to my problems I barely left my room and created lines on my arms I had a best friend and hated my family Now I am sixteen And suicide is no longer just a word or topic It lives in me and powers my mind I struggle to leave my bed and lines on my arm multiply I have no friends and my family is all I have left.