The Streets of the Danged

I was a vampire that night. My fangs were red and orange with candy corn. My face was smeared white with sweat and paste Causing a ghoulishly acrid taste to drip into my mouth. My plan and curfew were quite clear, quite simple: I needed to suck the mortality out of 4-7 9-year-old female virgins And be back home in bed by 9:45. (It could be done.) The week prior I had heard of an un-dead 3rd grader in Transylvania... Sucked the blood of 100 10-year-old ex-girlfriends And still made it home for apples and cheese. Yet my own path of hallow'd terror Could not commence unless I fixed the strap of my candy bucket. I discarded the flimsy plastic strap for some frightfull-looking bungee cords, For you see, I was not only the Ruler of the Night, winged and blood-thirsty, I was also a genius! (I knew where the tiny bungees were kept.) With deadened grace I floated slowly out the front door And into the tar-colored world of shrieks and cries and moms. I would show no mercy! Vanquish all Truth and Light! And always look both ways Before crossing the Streets Of the Dead! (And the Danged!)