The Stone Man

His heart was cold, cold as stone as
he sat staring straight ahead. He
had white lines from squinting painted
on the sides of his suntanned temples.
Even the wide brimmed hat he wore
couldn’t protect his face from the sun
which seemed to burn like a ball of 
fire coming from hell. He hated his 
Sergeant for dragging them through this 
barren dessert searching for an outlaw 
named Jake McCloud and he was certain
Jakes bones would already be bleached 
from the sun when and if they ever
found him. Five men had already died and 
now they sat waiting for Sergeant Bennett's
next command with stomachs aching and 
lips cracked from thirst. He knew death
was following them rapidly so having
enough he grabbed the Sergeant’s gun and 
sword and made Him get off his horse. Don’t
be a fool the Sergeant had pleaded with him, 
we are almost there. He ignored him saying
you’ve been telling us this for days and he 
rode off alone. He lasted two days out there 
alone when his horse fell over from exhaustion,
then he walked for hours staggering like a
drunk. Finally worn and broken, thirsty and
starving, he took out the little medal stool 
he had and sat down slouched and beaten.
The Indians tell tales of how the man with
the stone heart sat that day a broken man 
and as he sat there his whole wretched 
body turned to stone. To this day, you can 
see him slouched in his chair in a place
called East Jesus. 
His Sergeant and comrades? They were
rescued by the Calvary just hours after 
he had left them. 

Written by Brenda Meier-Hans 
12.20.2014
Contest: East Jesus

Copyright © | Year Posted 2014



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Date: 1/28/2015 8:21:00 AM
Great lines with blessed words. Thanks for the magnificient share. I hope the new year is going well so far..
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Date: 12/26/2014 12:53:00 AM
oh my, I just hate that when the good thing is right around the corner and then the person just gives up or messes up and never gets to enjoy vindication. this was SO good to get that idea across. GREAT story you got from that crazy picture . I love how you let your imagination get such good writing from you!!!
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Brenda Meier-Hans
Date: 12/29/2014 6:39:00 PM
Thanks Andrea. I will take this as a complement.
Date: 12/25/2014 10:53:00 PM
WOW, that's impressive how you wrote, and painted the photo with words, Brenda... Enjoy your days and the coming New Year. Love ~LINDA~
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Brenda Meier-Hans
Date: 12/29/2014 6:35:00 PM
Thank you Linda.
Date: 12/23/2014 12:41:00 PM
#7 for a great tale that got me hooked straight away, and I followed the captivating trail right to the end, Brenda. Wish you all the best in this contest, but even more I wish you a blessed, holy and happy Christmas. // paul
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Brenda Meier-Hans
Date: 12/29/2014 6:34:00 PM
Thanks so much Paul. I'm glad you finished reading it. :-).
Date: 12/23/2014 6:18:00 AM
Thanks for the name, I also meant to tell you, the fist 8 lines were perfect, it set the hook and made me read the rest of the story---I know novelist that can't do that---I have a friend that writes western novels--and when he sends me a copy for critiquing---I almost always have him rewrite the first three paragraphs---he should have your talent.
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Brenda Meier-Hans
Date: 12/23/2014 9:36:00 AM
Your welcome Jerry and thank you so much for the beautiful compliment.
Date: 12/23/2014 4:35:00 AM
- An interesting story, dear Brenda - Well written ! - Wishing you and your family a beautiful Christmas - oxox // Anne-Lise :)
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Brenda Meier-Hans
Date: 12/23/2014 9:35:00 AM
Thank you Anne Lise
Date: 12/22/2014 11:04:00 PM
Very nice pen here Brenda! Truly enjoyed your wonderful uplifting story dear friend. I wish you and your family a very Merry Christmas! Have a very lovely night!:) Love and hugs! xxxxooxxx D.
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Brenda Meier-Hans
Date: 12/23/2014 9:35:00 AM
Thanks so much Dorian.
Date: 12/22/2014 5:37:00 AM
You know I like Westerns, and this is no exception ! One thing though, I would have like the Sargent to have a name---this would have drawn me closer to the main character and made the story less formal. That being said, Great story Brenda
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Brenda Meier-Hans
Date: 12/22/2014 5:46:00 AM
Thanks for your comment Jerry and just for you I gave Sergeant Bennett a name. :-).
Date: 12/21/2014 9:37:00 PM
Hi Brenda, what an awesome story! You present vivid imagery and details to hold the reader's attention, and I really enjoyed this so much. Good luck in the contest. Hugs, Sandra
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Brenda Meier-Hans
Date: 12/22/2014 5:40:00 AM
Thanks so much Sandra, I'm glad you like it.
Date: 12/21/2014 3:26:00 PM
you really sank your pen deep into the visual art of the theme, Brenda.. this is remarkable.. huggs
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Brenda Meier-Hans
Date: 12/22/2014 5:39:00 AM
Thank you so much Nette
Date: 12/21/2014 11:14:00 AM
Awesome . . . I like a good story and this one was a great one . . . peace and joy my dear friend.
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Brenda Meier-Hans
Date: 12/21/2014 3:07:00 PM
Thanks so much David.
Date: 12/21/2014 11:13:00 AM
Merry Christmas Brenda,a super story here, I wish luck in the contest...huggs
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Brenda Meier-Hans
Date: 12/21/2014 3:08:00 PM
Thank you Kayod5
Date: 12/21/2014 9:25:00 AM
What a great story, and the photo compliments your writing. 7!
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Brenda Meier-Hans
Date: 12/21/2014 3:08:00 PM
Thank you Richard.
Date: 12/20/2014 4:21:00 PM
A fabulous story Brenda...hugs Tim
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Brenda Meier-Hans
Date: 12/21/2014 3:09:00 PM
Thanks so much Tim.
Date: 12/20/2014 1:44:00 PM
Wow you had me hooked from start to end by this write Brenda - very good luck in the contest:-) hugs jan xx
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Brenda Meier-Hans
Date: 12/21/2014 3:10:00 PM
Thank you Jan. I'm so glad you like it. XOXO.
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