The Smaller Child

When I was but a baby boy No sweeter life could I enjoy Beyond my room, my welcome bed My refuge in the years ahead Where nothing but the night is black And black is never dark for lack Of something bright or greater light But merely brings a lesser sight And should a sullen something scratch Or enter unbeknownst to hatch A nightmare by my crib or bed No lack of love appeared instead But still there grew impending fear That drew from shadows newly near To tempt the tender tears of youth And soon betray a child's truth "Oh father, please forgive me not I know what disappointment brought Is really not a son to be Someone to make you proud of me I'm sorry mama made me small I'm sorry I was born at all I can't conceive what you deride But father, how I hurt inside" Compelling pity suffers more The senseless shame of years before When innocence of sense beguiled Betrayed a pure defenseless child But though compassion must compare The passion with the just and fair The finer folk who bless the young Cannot redress a mocking tongue What happens to a child when Survival means to start again Without a clue or clear belief Except in seeking true relief To do your best is not enough Especially when love is tough So tough we often run away To die again another day.